Connie and Her Epiphany in Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been

The short story I chose to write about is “Where Are you Going, Where Have You Been?” by Joyce Carol Oates. The main character in this short story is Connie. She is a young teenager who is going through a moment of confusion and change in her life. She is affected emotionally and physically. She longs to be a self-sufficient. She is inexperienced yet self-assured in the way she looks. She can’t help but constantly stare at her pleasing looks. Connie is a social individual who desperately strives for attention. Towards the end of this story, Connie has a horrible encounter with Arnold. It caught her off guard. This made Connie distressed and displeased. After that experience, she changed her view of what the adult life would be like and she wanted to erase that from her mind. Connie wanted to stay a young innocent teenager as she was before. This situation forced Connie to grow up faster and become self-aware of her surroundings and actions. She became more reserved and did not want the attention she was getting from Arnold. 

Readers can learn from this story that people become who they are as a result of his or her experiences throughout life. Teenagers can be easily influenced because of their vulnerability and desire of the unknown. It is important that teenagers get the necessary guidance so that he or she does not fall victim to harmful situations such as what Connie has experienced. Connie deals with a conflict inside of her. She is not sure who she is as a person and hopes to gain her own independence. She is not satisfied with being a young girl and the thought of being an adult intrigues her. She wants to become a woman. Connie’s behavior shows that she is trying to identify who she is by acting as two different people. When she is at home she is reserved and her dress attire is not revealing. She is not trying to stand out. However, when she is out with her friends, she dresses provocatively, to get the looks she wants from men. “Everything about her had two sides to it, one for home and one for anywhere that was not home:…” (Oates, 126). The setting in this short story is at Connie’s home in the suburbs. This is where Connie experienced little attention and guidance from her family. As a result, she acted promiscuous. Connie sought the attention she needed, elsewhere. Her home is also where she met Arnold and that changed her emotionally. The restaurant played an important role in her development. This is where she spent hours with Eddie and got his undivided attention as well as the first time Connie saw Arnold at a distance.

 Connie has different relationships throughout this short story. Her relationship with her mother is confrontational and she does not take Connie as seriously as she did her sister, Judy. Connie’s mother constantly compares Connie to her sister Judy. Judy was constructive with her time and according to her mother, Connie was not. “Connie had to hear her praised all the time by her mother and her mother’s sisters. June did that, she saved money and helped clean the house and cooked and Connie couldn’t do a thing, her mind was all filled with trashy daydreams.” (Oates, 126). Judy seemed to be the favored older sister to Connie. This indirectly created a divide between Connie and Judy. Connie has a father who is rarely in the picture. He was always busy working and barely communicates with her or the rest of the family. Even though she has a father figure in her life, she is missing the interaction with him. Both parents provide little guidance for her. Each of these compromised relationships negatively impacted Connie and contributes to her behavior. When Arnold pull into Connie’s driveway, she was curious and interested in what was happening. She wanted to make sure she looked good for him and that he would accept her. “Her heart began to pound and her fingers snatched at her hair, checking it, and she whispered, “Christ, Christ,” wondering how she looked.” (Oates, 129). Her attitude started to change when Arnold tried to force his way into her house. “Connie stared at him, another wave of dizziness and fear rising in her so that for a moment he wasn’t even in focus”. (Oates 133). Connie felt threatened and scared. “She rushed forward and tried to lock the door. Her fingers were shaking.” (Oates, 134). The climax in this story is when Arnold strongly pushed his way into her house even though Connie tried to keep it from happening. At that point Connie’s world is turned upside down and she mentally collapses. From that point on she realized she was not dreaming of what it would be like as an adult, but rather seeing first-hand that being an adult did not correlate with what she thought it would be like. The inappropriate behavior Arnold had towards Connie, made her grow up faster than a teenager normally would. He came onto her in a strong manner. Shortly after, Connie realized that she needed her parents and that they played a big role in her life. Aside from their differences, Connie’s mother means so much more to her than she ever noticed; “She cried out, she cried for her mother,…” (Oates, 136). “She thought, I’m not going to see my mother again.” 

After reading about Connie’s character and her experiences, readers can learn that the teenage years are an influential time where healthy relationships between family members are important in guiding the teenager to make the right choices. There are mentally ill people around that look for vulnerable teenagers such as Connie. Connie has gained more insight as to what she wants in her life and has a better understanding of who she is after encountering Arnold. The story does not tell the reader what happens at the end, but my assumptions are that Connie tries to make her relationships stronger with her mother, father and sister. I think the previous incident with Arnold straightened her out and she is less likely to look for attention and may dress less scandalous when she goes out with her friends. I also think Connie will be less inclined to spend her time with older men and appreciate herself for who she is. This short story would appeal to women in general but more specifically to teenage women who would be able to relate on several different levels by their experiences. I think every teenage girl faces some sort of rebellion in that period. 

Works Cited 

• Oates, Joyce Carol. “Where Are You Going Where Have You Been?” From The Norton Introduction To Literature Shorter Twelfth Edition, by W.W. Norton & Company, Inc. New York, New York, 2017, pp.125-137.