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Just by looking in to your eyes, I could swear you have some thing to tell me. Speak up. Dad, just spit it out! In the back of my mind, I already knew what he was going to say and I could already feel that ball of fire building up in my throat. My mind is telling me to react, to show some kind of facial emotion. Why cant I breath!? Why is it hard to breath?! I’m choking, I’m going to through up! Make it stop. I will do anything to stop the pain just make the horror go away! I stood there paralyzed; emotionless as everyone else waited to see that first tear drop down my pail white face, yet I could only stand there in a trans staring at the overwhelming brightness of eggshell white.
I felt as if I had just paid the price, this is not something you can just undo except all I could think was “How does this happen to a 18 year old? How does someone come out from this? What about my baby brother? I just replayed the last couple of months in my head over and over again; all those doctors and diagnoses she received in just one month. She was always so perfectly healthy, never in her life had she touched a cigarette and despised the smell of liquor. So what happened? Was it that smutty house we walked into? I could see the nurses in the corner of my cloudy eyes unplugging her from all the monitors, as if they were getting the room ready for the next patient. I just stood there in the corridor, inhaling that suffocating smell of death. Scrutinizing the rigid bed that carried her lifeless body.
One of the nurses grabbed my stone cold hand and apologized for my loss but it was important that test me for swine flue since we had been in contact with the patient. I turned around and looked at her with this piercing stare.
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