Daniel Sloss and Cameron Esposito's Approach to Challenging Taboos

In today's society, stand-up comedians act as a kind of ethnographer, one who systematically studies an array of people and cultures. Comedians are not only studying and observing those around him but combining those observations most often with their own experiences to create a unique narrative that acts as a social commentary for the masses to engage and relate with. Comedians are increasingly becoming critical thought leaders on serious topics and relevant issues in order to bring awareness and get a laugh in the process. These topics, considered unsuitable for comedy purposes by many, can include anything from racism, national tragedies, disabilities, and most recently, sexual assault and the #metoo movement. In this essay, I will analyze comedian, Daniel Sloss, and his recent HBO comedy special, X, which challenges dominant ideologies surrounding rape and the role men play in the #metoo movement. Along with this analysis, we will take a look at Cameron Esposito's comedic special, Rape Jokes, and discuss the significance of experience and where the power should be placed when discussing a seemingly taboo topic.

Daniel Sloss, a Scottish comedian known for his dark humor, profane jokes, and jarring delivery spends the first seventy-five minutes of his 2019 special entertaining his audience with a series of jokes, curse words, and stories from his past in order to lure his audience in. The last fifteen minutes, however, delivers something else - a Ted Talk of sorts (his words) focusing on toxic masculinity, the rape joke, and challenging the dominant ideology that rape and sexual assault are a 'women's issue'. His #MeToo movement inspired Ted Talk develops into a story of the sexual assault of one of his closest female friends and the subsequent fallout with another, her attacker. Uniquely, in Sloss’s routine from this point onward, the rape jokes mentioned do not originate from him, but the female survivor. As the story goes, Sloss's female-friend went out with him and two of his friends one night. The next morning, over breakfast, she confided in Sloss about the assault and her attacker, one of his friends from that night whom he had known for the last eight years. The first rape joke occurs during a dialogue between Sloss and his friend, “Did you say no?” Sloss asks, “Yeah, more times than the 2 Unlimited song” his friend replies. Common is the idea that rape jokes are not funny and cannot be funny, a popular dominant ideology in the world of comedy that the audience believes. However, In this case, a rape joke is in fact found both humorous and appropriate because both the woman telling the joke and the person she was telling it to could recognize and understand the joke's intention - to refuse to let a traumatic event of such magnitude have 'all-consuming power' over both the survivor, and Sloss, a secondary witness of the situation. This was then followed by another joke after Sloss asked her for permission to tell her story on stage, 'But when has my permission ever been needed for anything?'. What occurs during these crucial parts of both her story and his comedic set are important signs like Sloss’ visible grimaces and body crumpling movements that help signify his discomfort with the subject, followed by a mixture of laughter and silence from the audience - another crucial sign that helps signify the discomfort and confusion from the audience, who aren’t positive on how they should react. By incorporating these rape jokes into his act, Sloss is serving to correct an imbalance of power, not reinforce it, and instead choosing to focus on the survivor discourse as the main discourse when discussing rape.

Historically, the rape joke has fallen flat and has been used as a quick way to make people uncomfortable while focusing on the perpetrator, rather than the survivor. This helps explain why so many support the dominant ideology that rape jokes aren’t funny - but is it the content of the joke or the way it is delivered? The rape joke has long been used by male comedians purely seeking a reaction, no lesson learned. The idea that these experiences are female-gender based helps create a masculine ideology which in turn, excuses the involvement of men as allies. Instead of following in other men’s misplaced humor, Sloss challenges this dominant ideology with a message to men. Delivered more like an emotional plea for help, he asks his male audience members to identify instances of misogyny in those around them and to do something about it. This counteracts the dominant ideology that rape is a “women's issue' and that men can do no wrong by putting the responsibility on men as well. An excerpt found in Barker and Jane (pg. 357) discusses the study of moral reasoning by Carol Gilligan in which she argues, 'western cultural norms have validated men's understanding of morality and ethics at the expense of women's, which has been cast as deficient'. This not only helps explain the masculine ideology but also affirms the outdated 'boys will be boys' way of viewing women's issues. And while Barker and Jane define ideology as a “lived experience”, this does not excuse men from the table or the conversation just because they haven’t lived it. And that is exactly what Sloss is trying to teach in his special. He almost dares #MeToo movement naysayers by saying, “And if you think this doesn't affect you, ask the women in your life if they've ever experienced any form of sexual assault or harassment and watch your world crumble in front of you. For women, it literally happens all the time'. While Sloss does not have the lived experience of being a victim of sexual assault, he does have the lived experience of being a man caught up in a situation involving sexual assault, and for him, that is enough to act. He encourages the men in the audience by saying, 'Instead of having this fucking hero complex and being, like, ‘I’m going to beat up a rapist,’ just stop one - because I know it can be done, because I know how I fucking failed at it”. The emotion he delivers on the stage is another signifier - one filled with his personal pain and trauma from the experience which makes his stance and plea to the other men in the room so successful, emotional, and raw.

I wanted to compare and contrast Daniel Sloss’ performance, a man speaking on behalf of his close female friend’s experience, with that of Cameron Esposito’s special, Rape Jokes, which highlights her personal sexual assault experience. Rape Jokes is centered around a night when she played a drinking game with a man who then sexually assaulted her when she was drunk. And like anything regarding a typically serious and trauma filled topic, it walks a dangerously thin line between belly-aching comedy and deep, emotion-filled drama. Esposito helps narrate these high and low points throughout her act with the help of her unique voice inflections, this helps serve as a sign, not only in relation to cultural studies but also for her audience to help signify when she is telling a joke versus detailing something more serious. According to her, her goal is to 'reframe assault as a lived experience instead of a topic for quips about perpetrators trying to reclaim their careers”. This is something Sloss and Esposito share in their specials, putting the power in the hands of the survivors and choosing to make the attackers the butt of the joke, rather than the victims which historically, has been the most common. In her special she details, “We've had rape jokes forever but it's just like, those jokes have usually been, like, 'RAPE.' [laughter] That's the full joke.', in order to combat this, Esposito wants to make sure the national conversation around sexual assault includes the voices of the survivors which helps support and encourage the survivor discourse to be the main discourse in this discussion. In a PBS interview with Esposito explains her position on tackling taboo topics, 'I don't think any topics are off-limits. But I think if the way to deal with taboo subjects or subjects that can be painful is to lead with personal experience if you have it. If you don't have a personal experience you need to be aware of that, and you need to be aware that you are perhaps speaking to an audience that has more experience with something than you do and acknowledge that”. We see this same cautious and self-aware approach in Sloss’ special as well as the two specials similar endings - a plea to men, again challenging the dominant ideology that men don’t belong in women’s issues and instead reinforcing the idea that they do carry some weight in this topic. Sloss urges his male audience to be an ally, to wake the fuck up and stop a rapist if they can - because he knows it can be done. Similarly, Esposito encourages men to “get in the way”, like a man once did for her in her time of need.

While some may see comedy as a light-hearted, laughter-filled pastime, there is an opportunity for comedy and comedians to serve a higher purpose by leveraging their platform to speak out on important issues and collecting laughs in the process. Comedy helps marry both humor and social commentary in a clever, topical, and relevant way for their audiences to connect with. Comedians are often known for making their audiences uncomfortable, and truly talented comedians do this intentionally to help serve a purpose. Comedians serve as a form of popular culture and help serve a crucial role in our society as the social commentators of our world. They can both captivate and confront their audiences by forcing them to acknowledge the issues and harsh realities that plague our society that most would prefer to just ignore. One of these issues is the conversation around sexual assault and helping survivors gain their voices back and speak out, something Esposito says inspired her to create her stand-up special. While some may argue that these topics have no business being communicated in a humor-filled way, others would say that the degree to which comedians play with “the line” is healthy and necessary. This healthy relationship helps signify that comedians are true thought leaders and are willing to take risks and push social boundaries for the sake of serving a higher purpose by having tough conversations and bringing important issues to light for their audiences.