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The wind whipped around the corner, moaning and warning me that torrential rain awaited me. Without hesitating, I shut all the windows in my room. I fumbled down the stairs to the living room and sat on a couch. The sound of the ticking clock floated on the silent atmosphere. I had always been used to solitude- I would practically say that I enjoyed it. All this while, I never believed in family relationships and friendships. Since the day he left me in despair, I felt like as if the whole world collapsed upon me.
I recalled the happy memories I had with him when I was still young. We had the best time of our lives even though our family was not financially-capable. Mum passed away three days after I was born so I was left with my father. He had always been caring and giving unwavering support in my studies. Although he only managed to make a meager living laboring during the day and driving taxis at night, he never gave up in providing the best for me in education field. Home was a dilapidated mud shack with so many holes puncturing its walls, but that did not stop us from living a happy life. We had love, caring, togetherness and all the intangibles that make a family name worth bearing. Dad was always exhausted after hours of night shifts, but he never failed to send me to school every day.
However, my life completely turned upside down after a tragedy took place when I was eleven. It was twenty years ago but not even a second in my life that the awful memories would escape my mind. It was raining cats and dogs when my father was driving me to school on that particular day. Traffic was terrible and the roads were slippery. We were singing nursery rhymes when all of a sudden, BANG! The pair of intense eyes framed by dark circles of fatigue was the last thing that I had seen in my life.
When I woke up, I realized I was admitted to the hospital. However, my eyes were fully covered with medical cloth and all I could see was utter darkness. Then, I heard voices of people whispering beside my bed. The voices were unfamiliar to me so I turned to ask about my father’s condition but there was no answer to my question. A nurse then approached me and informed me that I had a severe brain concussion and due to that I have lost one of my main senses, my eyesight. At that moment, my heart shattered into pieces and fear surrounded me. My mind was completely shut down and all I could think of was my father, but his whereabout was still unclear.
A few days later, a social worker paid me a visit. That was the day when I was awakened to life’s lessons of hate, conviction and the darker side of human’s nature. I was told that my father made a decision to abandon me and send me to an orphanage due to my incurable disease, which might burden him for the rest of his life. Flabbergasted and devastated by his implacable decision, tears rolled down my cheeks. No one could ever understand what I felt at that moment- it was like daggers in my heart with unbearable pain.
As planned, I was sent to an orphanage and had spent half of my childhood there. I was bullied terribly by other children due to my disability. There was not even a day where I could escape from cruel insultments and their sadistic laugh. At one point, I was totally on the verge of giving up on life but luckily something hit me and I knew that I could never change my past but I can always fight for a better future. Even though I could never be my old radiant self again, I knew I had to stand strong in order to achieve my dream. I promised myself to study hard no matter how difficult the road was going to be. So, I began to learn how to be independent and to take care of myself with the big changes that I had to adapt in my daily routines.
During sleepless nights, I would still miss my father but knowing the fact that he was not going to come back for me, I knew I had to accept reality. The goal of being a successful barrister was the only thing in my mind and the road to achieve it was never easy. Despite being a disabled individual, I still managed to gather up all the fortitude I had and fight for my own goals in life. Giving up was never an option for me. Embracing my disability of being blind, I had never let it to be my weakness or an obstacle to achieve my dream.
After years of hardwork, my efforts finally paid off. Now, being ranked as one of the world-top barristers, I had learnt something, “people can always look down on you but you can never look down on yourself”. No one can change the past, but it is our choice whether to let it haunt us for the rest of our lives or to motivate us for a better change. Determination and persistence always win in the end. Knowing that nothing worth-having comes easily, I have always placed my career as one of my priorities in life.
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