Letter to My Brother

Dear bro,

It’s the most anticipated day of the year come again but the tragedy of this day is that unlike all the years that we have spent this day together this year we are so far apart. It feels off kilter and sad all at the same time. I wish we had been together this Rakhi as well, doing all our conventional leg pulling and teasing the way we used to.

I am blessed to have a brother like you and the words won’t justify the amount of respect and love I have for you. As mother fondly recalls the time when I first arrived, you were scared to hold me, you were scared that this miniature baby would crumble if you so much as touch her and she would somehow vanish. You were fascinated by my small hands and spend counting each finger twice a day. A four year old boy got a little toy to play with and he was ecstatic. This baby grew up to be your partner-in-crime, playmate, little nuisance and sometimes a total pain in the ass.

You made me what I am today. You made me strong, wild, independent and sassy. We have made plethora of memories together and played countless of made up games throughout the day and night. If I never had your calming presence, I would have been a sad case of classic spoilt brat but you grounded me.

We shared our own secret world of imaginary pirates, you were Peter Pan and I was one of the lost boys, fighting captain Hook, climbing imaginary mountains, going on epic quests for lost treasures. It was just you, me and our backyard. How can I forget all the senseless things we tried and got trashed within the inch of our life?

This day all the memories are replaying through my brain on an endless loop. I wish I can somehow transcend space and time and reach you to tie that one sacred thread and not break the one ritual that we have been doing together since we were in diapers. As a kid we did this to satisfy our mother and competed over who has better rakhi. I was jealous of the shiny diamonds and pretty designs that winked at me from your wrist. So, I would cry and you would always remove the shiniest rakhi from your wrist and tie it on mine.

As we grew older, it was not a competition anymore but a deep sense of sentimentality and emotions whenever I tied it on your wrist. It was renewal of the promise that we shared and a ritual that promised so much without uttering a single word. I will terribly miss this ritual because it signifies that we have been through so much. We have grown up together with our grandmother’s stories whispering magical realms into our ears, weaving dream worlds distant and untouched and the echoes of gods mighty and strong. It shows that we have shared bruises, tears and all the mighty adventures that makes the childhood most beautiful phase ever.

So, even though we are far apart, our heart is still together. It lies in the distant fields of unripe maize where we played hide and seek, it still beats in the silent echoes of the laughter that we shared while rolling down the hills and it would always find it’s peace at the end of the day in the childish antics buried deep in our memories. Photographs can only capture frozen memories but this heart replays those memories and brings it to life. I’ll always cherish these memories in my heart. Forever.

Yours Lovingly,

Sister that still trails behind you

How My Brother has Influenced Me

My world was an ordinary world. A world where everything and everyone was as imperfect as could be. A world where things repeated daily. A world that most of us knew of. I woke up. Went to school or work, then I went home. Sat on the couch, slept and then repeated the same routine. That was my world once upon a time.

Ever since my little brother was born, my world has been drastically different. I had the responsibilities of a loving and caring older sibling and I went home every day seeing my little brother’s joyful smiles, which reminded me that my world is not such a boring place as it may seem. I can recall every event which occurred on the day that my brother was born.

The school holidays had just started, and it was a warm morning. Every minute felt like hours as I sat impatiently in the hospital waiting room, with my back slumped and eyes droopy. I had waited for more than one hour, but there was still no baby’s cry heard. With my heart thumping so much that I was able to hear it and the sound of the clock ticking each second, it was a nerve-racking experience. My fingers were uncontrollably banging on the back of my phone as I tried to call my father, who was also in the operating theatre with my mother. Of course, there was no answer, but being my usual impatient self, I called again… and again to a total of five times.

I could see my phone slowly getting blurred as my eyes filled up with tears. Thoughts suddenly jolted into my mind like a lightning strike (an extremely noisy and depressed type of lightning strike that would make people want to almost bang their head at a wall and lose control).

What if the operation failed? Were there problems with my little brother? Did my mother have a miscarriage?

I wiped my eyes and looked up. I thought I had heard a faint cry. There he was. My mother was laying in the bed with my baby brother, my dad walking alongside her, and a nurse was pushing her bed towards the waiting room. I bolted up and ran to my mum. He was so gorgeous. He had eyes of an angel and black hair. His head was slightly misshapen probably because of the forceps used to grab him. I still have the video of him on my phone.

The nurse told me to be careful of the wheels as she pushed the bed into the maternity ward. My mum stayed at the hospital and my dad drove me home. The next day, I was so excited to visit my brother and mother in the hospital again. We drove to the hospital and I was able to see many more features of his face which I did not see the day before. His head was no longer as misshapen, and his eyes were half open.

The reason why my brother has shaped me into who I am today is because of all the responsibilities he gave me. I had to babysit him when my parents were away, change his nappies, and overall the burden of taking care of someone and making sure that they are not hurt. He has helped me to take leadership and take responsibility if anything happens to him. This has helped me to be less afraid to lead and always be mindful of the people around me. This is what my world is like, not so boring.

Works Cited

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