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Desire to be able to design and execute comprehensive decision support systems that consider complex business landscape and dynamic nature of stakeholders, took root in 6th semester pursuing Computer Engineering (CE). I chose CE in a family of doctors (father general surgeon and mother ophthalmologist) because I was fascinated with C programming and how organised patterns can give results.
Stepping into Nirma University for CE, I was geared up to achieve. The first semester I scored great marks, but I lost some steam in the 3rd and 4th semesters. This is because while I was enjoying what I was doing, I had not found what I really wanted to do. I plunged into extracurricular activities to keep me motivated to excel. I volunteered to teach underprivileged students at government run schools, and discovered how information systems could help keep track of progress of students in a country with a 1. 15 billion population. I volunteered for TedX on Nirma University and realised how much can be done in one life time. I had seen my parents strive and touch many lives, I realised it can also be done through CE and it’s off shoots. I went on to become Creative Head of Association of Computer Engineering Students on campus and Invincible Leaders League, too. I edited magazines and organised events with significant success. Leading teams, directing conversation, listening, and providing people management solutions I enjoyed greatly in all these roles. I was a bridge between management, experts, volunteers, and student audiences. I thoroughly enjoyed these interactions and knew that I wanted to be in a field that involved people interaction and managerial inputs. Such field with basis in technology I discovered over the next couple of semesters. During the 5th semester, I worked on project on Automatic Number Plate Recognition using Python and OpenCV.
My city does not possess a traffic sense. We (citizens) constantly need to be policed and significant interventions are needed for us to fall in line. Working on this project, I considered interacting with the Traffic Police Department to help solve issues. This led to thinking how systems can be used to solve such people issues. Analysing past data and making decisions would be useful I realised and in turn got interested in Data Mining and Business Analysis and Optimisation. These subjects I chose for the 6th semester. Delving into these subjects has made MIS my arena. It is a field that will use my people and management skills in combination with my computer knowledge and skills. Definition of purpose in the last couple of lifted my performance to higher levels. It helped that I did a 2 week training with Infosys Foundation (part of Infosys Ltd one of India’s largest IT services companies). Doing well and being a standard to myself was reiterated working and learning alongside competitive and motivated others. In this period, I learnt Python programming, Python-Orcale database connectivity and developed an Interactive Shopping Cart.
Discussing uses of information systems in organisations with trainers and other participants added to my desire to pursue this career. Currently, I am working on a project for Twitter Sentiment Analysis for 2019 India Elections using Hadoop, Flume, and Hive to gauge outcome. As I discover more uses I become even more deeply interested. Seeking to truly achieve and make a name at the global level I want to launch my career with full preparation.
Although the writer’s expression is clear, there are certain improvements that can be made to the first paragraph. For example, the hook sentence is too long and does not comprise a complete sentence. The writer should reduce its length and make sure the sentence is complete. This should be followed by a brief introduction to the subject of Computer Engineering and lastly, a thesis statement where the writer should explain what aspects of C programming he/she finds fascinating. Word choice is appropriate and the writer’s expression is eloquent. There are also no major problems in sentence construction. The evidence presented is quite detailed but it is suggested that the writer should add more examples to provide support to the thesis statement regarding aspects that are fascinating. Moreover, organisation may be improved by adding subheadings and by making sure that each paragraph deals with only one point.
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