My Personal Experience of Women Friendship

It all started when my one and only friend, Claira got a boyfriend. Now you would think that that would be a happy occasion, but honestly it hurt me. We had always been an inseparable duo, and now there was a wedge between us. We were often the odd ones out, but with each other it never bothered us. Now since he showed up, its starting to get bad. I mean she left me to get mauled over by the rest of the world.

But lets back up. I live in a little town of the name of Helms Deep. Nothing ever happens in this town besides gossip. Everywhere I go I hear the whispers about me. Everyone has something to say. Most of all the boys. Why don't they see me as they do other girls? Why do the girls tease and taunt? Why am I so different? Why do they tell me in ugly. Why cant a guy just like me. All these questions run through my head daily. Why cant i just be pretty like other girls? Like claira.

“Annabelle, wait up!” says Claira, from across the hall. I start to walk away, I can't handle talking to her any more. She is a popular now and every one likes her. Now I am the only reject.

She grabs my wrist and spins me around to face her. Madness boils up inside of me.

“Leave me alone, Claira. Haven't you caused me enough pain already?”

“Annabelle, I never meant to hurt you. Wont you be happy for me?”

“Im sorry Claira, While you're off fitting in, I'm now the center of the bullies.”

“Well if you would just try a little harder maybe they wouldn't pick on you so bad.” That hurts. She just struck such a low blow that I don't know if i'll ever be able to forgive her. I spin away and run down the hall.

Since shes been gone i've got ridicule nonstop. The girls teased me non stop for my “homely” face and my “terrible sense in style”. The say im ugly. I mean why should someone tease you for your looks. Its not like I can change how I was born. My mom just tells me to deal with it, but my dad says to stick up for myself. Oh, what to do, what to do.

A couple days later was when the murders started showing up in the news papers. Too gruesome for pictures, the papers simply stated that the victim's face was missing. However, they were able to identify the body and it was a girl from my class. Her name was Hayden; she and I werent close anymore, but we had been at one time. In like 5th grade we were like best friends, but now we were frenemies. She was a pretty girl, and they guys all liked her. And pretty much everyone liked her. I don't dislike her, i guess i was just envious of her. Why should she get to be pretty?

The loss sure stirred up the town. Mom started telling me to be careful out there, and she even gave me some pepper spray. The school started putting up signs on being careful around strangers. Everyone at school mourned her death and we even had a school wide funeral. If I would die would this many people care about me? No, I decided, no one would show up for me. We got school off for a couple of days. This was nice for me. I could just sit around reading and chill out. No one to bother me. However, It sure was lonely without Claira. She texts me sometimes but i don't feel much need to talk to her. She ditched me for a guy.

When we started school up again, the blows came from all around. It seemed like around every corner there was a new danger to be wrestled with. New jokes about me. New mean comments. New little outstretched feet. Just look down and walk away, I always tell my self. It hurts so deeply with every new assault.

The next day in the morning news paper another new murder made the front page. Once again a kid from my class. Adele ,a girl I had classes with every day. Another faceless victim, lost to the world. Adele and I had kind of a bitter sweet relationship. I mean she was never mean to my face, but whispers never took long to get back to you. And often i could see her glaring at me and then whispered something and snicker to her little possy. However, i suppose she had some good deep down. Deep deep down. After all, she was a beautiful girl who could always get a guy. Guys loved her. That had to be something, right?

The School was called off for the rest of the week. Which was nice. I guess sitting at home and reading and watching movies wasn't so bad. It was going good until the next day one more victim without a face was found. This girl was also in my grade, however she was never really nice to me. Often teasing me and being rude to me. I feel bad but i didn't feel any remorse for her. She had caused me so much trouble in my life. The ultimate bully to me. Stacy had spread some terrible rumors about me way in my past that still haunt me today. Just in one year she had changed me from a carefree happy girl to a shy withdrawn girl. She had caused me a mental spiral downfall. therefor, I guess i was a little happy to see her on the list. She may have been pretty on the outside, but one the inside there was nothing but ugliness.

A couple moments later my cell rang. I looked at the caller i.d., It was Claira. I slowly picked up the phone, dreading to hear some story about her and her boy friend.

“Annabell! What are you up to tonight?”

“Um, just chilling out, I guess.”

“Well not anymore. We are going to Olive Garden.”

“Really just you and me?” I was so excited. I hadn't spent any time alone with her since she got her boy friend.

“well not quite i invited my boy friend and ...someone else.”

“who?” I asked bewildered. I don't really know anyone else that we would hang out with.

“well, I invited Linus.”

“what! why! you know i've had the biggest crush on him forever! He’s way out of my league!”

“Annabelle calm down. Its like a double date. If you go ill buy you a new book.” She knew my weaknesses.

“Ok, you got me. I'll go, but it better be a book of my choice.” She told me she would pick me up around 6 and we would drive there together.

Once we walked into the restaurant i saw him. Oh man, did I have a crush on Linus. Claira walks over to her boy friend and i just stand there dumbly. Linus walks over and flashes me a smile. It just melts me inside. I mumble a hello. He just grins, takes my arm and leads me to my seat. Wow i've never had a guy be so nice to me. I'm not entirely sure why he was being so nice. Could it be possible that he liked me back? Could my life be turning around?

Dinner goes well. All around the table we talk and laugh. Claira and her boy friend really get friendly. When its over i feel a little disappointed. What if Linus doesn't talk to me any more. He was really sweet today but just... what if. As we head out the door i see Linus walk over to Claira and say quietly.

“DId I do good enough for you? Can I have my 20 bucks now?” I hear him whisper to her.

“Shhh. don't let her hear her. Just keep pretending till we drop her off.” Claira whispered hastily back. O my gosh. They were talking about me. SHe had bribed him to go out with me. This stung. This really stung. I tried my best not to loose it right there. I plastered a fake smile to my face. Those come so easily these days. And i get in the car silently. Linus gets in beside me and looks over and smiles. Hes a good actor Ill give him that. But I guess if I look hard enough I can see its an act. After paying attention to the way he smiles with his friends, I can tell this one is forced.

The car ride home seemed to take forever. The others made small talk, but I remained silent. Right before I got out Linus said goodnight. That made it even worse. How could he do this to someone.

I run inside and go to my bedroom. I flop on the bed and just lay there crying for what seems like forever. Then I creep down stairs and out to my car. I start it and drive over to Clairas. She doesn't live far so I don't have far to go. Her boy friends car is parked outside, and it looks like her parents were not home. I walk up to the door and knock.

“Annabelle, what are you doing here?” she says as she opens the door.

“Ohh I just had something I wanted to grab real quick.” I say to her.

“DId you leave something?”

“No but you have something that I have wanted for a while.”

That felt good. I feel so much better each time, and just one more to go. I know my way to Linus’s house by now. So the drive seems to fly by. I go up and I look to his window. Perfect, his lights are off all but a small lamp. There is a tree I can climb to get up there. I quickly scale the tree and i push the window open. I carefully step inside. He looks up as I set my last foot down.

“Annabelle. What are you doing here?” He asks startled and surprised.

“Why did you do it? Was I not pretty enough?” I ask

“ What? Do what? Of course you are pretty.” he says, but there is an edge and i can see through his lies now.

“ Im sorry Linus. There is just one face i can't live without. You are beautiful and you go for beautiful girls. That all i've ever wanted and something i'll never have.” I say softly. The tears flow freely now as i slip the knife from my boot.

“Annabell, wait. Just wait.” He says quickly. I cant do it. All i wanted was to believe that a guy could like me. I walk slowly over to him and whisper in his ear.

“I'll be beautiful now.” and the last thing he sees is my beautiful smile.