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Childhood Memories: The Best Trips from My Childhood

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Words: 1269 |

Pages: 3|

7 min read

Published: May 7, 2019

Essay grade:
Poor
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Words: 1269|Pages: 3|7 min read

Published: May 7, 2019

Essay grade:
Poor
arrow downward Read Review

My happiest moments I have lived where in my childhood. I think that you are never going to be as happy as you were when you were little. There are no worries when you are little the thing that worried you most were not important things. Everything is happy when you are a child, there are no problems. My most memorable moments happened when was a child, I can not remember a lot of them because i was very little but i remember the most exciting that were for me at that time.

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I was very naughty and I didn't like to do what they told me to because I got bored. I was in Montessori and my bestfriend was just like me, there was this girl that we didn't like because she always yelled at us because we didn't like to work. She had very long hair but it always was in a braid and we didn't like it because it was very messy and it didn't look clean, so when she was not looking we cut her braid. It was very funny at the time but it was not funny for her or the teachers. The teachers punished us very bad because it really was a mean thing to do, but we didn't really care because we didn't like her at all. It was always funny for us we never regret the moment.

My parents were never the kind of parents that didn't let you do what you wanted to, and were always very nice to me. They most of the time let me do whatever I wanted to. Some of my friends that I have now have been my bestfriends since babys. It is really nice to still have them in my life, they are my bestfriends. Most of them I know from school but some of them are because of our mothers, and it is really strange to think that you have spent all your life with them. It is really nice and it makes you very happy to think that.

Some of my most memorable moments are when i go to trips with people I really like. The trip that I really liked was when I went to disney land in Orlando. There is were all of kids love to go because it is like the happiest place on earth because everyong is happy here, you can not see a person that is not happy there. I remember a lot all of the rides and meeting all the characters, and that i was afraid of some of them because they were very weird. I loved going with all the princess because i said i wanted to be like them when i grew up. My favorite princess was Rapunzel because she had very long and blond hair and i loved it. And also because she had a pink dress and i loved the color pink.

Another trip that I remember a lot was when i went to six flags with Isabela that was mu bestfriend in that time. We went to san Antonio together and it was very fun, we went to all the water parks. I remember we were in a game and Isabela was very scared because we went in the front and we were very little and skinny and the cart was very big and the thing that was holding us was not that tight and we were afraid we might fall. When we went to the water parks it was very fun all of the slides were very entretaining we were sliding in a very big one that is very steep and in front of us there was a woman that she was very scared but her boyfriend made her slide and before she slid she fainted, it was very scary for us because we were very little so we scared so much tat we didn't slide in that one because we were very scared that might happen to us. In that slide also a women in front of us when she slide her swimming suit went like up, her bikini was in the bottom of her head and everyone saw everything, it was so embarassing for the poor lady. Also we saw a blind man that had a dog that took him everywhere because the dog was specialised on that type of things. It was very cool to see how the dog was that smart and also because I like dogs a lot. We did many fun things that time, even though we didn't went to a very awesome place I enjoyed it a lot!

One trip that i remember a lot was when i went with one of my best friend to a cruise to the Caribean islands. We both were going with our families, later we discovered that we were going to the same cruise and were so excited! We were together all of the time sometimes she came to sleep to my room or sometimes i went to hers. When we got down in the islands we also spent all of the time together because our mothers are also very good friends. One time we were at a mall and we got lost alone, we were very worried because we tought the cruise was going to go without us and we were crying but looking for someone we knew. We got to the entrance waiting for our mothers to come and then a guy that we had already seen in the cruise came to us and saw us crying and he asked us and helped us.

Then we found our moms, they were very worried and looking for us all over the place. When we were in the cruise one time we were walking and i started feeling very bad because I didn't have breakfast and I am claustrofobic and we were in a room with a lot of people. When we got out of the room we were going to go to the very top to be in the pool and then I fainted. My friend didn't know what to do but when I woke up I was in the nurse and there was all my family and my friend very worried. This has happened to me before because of strange things but i hate it when it happened to me. I slept for a a little time and then we went to the pool and keep having a good time. I think that was the best trip of my life in all times.

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I went to Cancun with all of my family, like also my aunts and cousins, everyone of my moms family. It was very cool because we rented a house and it was in front of the beach besides many hotels so it was like staying in a hotel but so much better because it was only for us the place. At night there was a thing that you could free some baby turtles to the ocean that they have just hatched. One baby turtle was dead when it was born so it was very very sad. The others were all alive and many people reunited there and you grab them with your hands they are so little, and then you leave them in the beach so they make their way to the ocean and live happily. On that trip we did so many fun and different things that were amazing. The trips that I mentioned where the best trips from my childhood.

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This essay was graded by
Dr. Oliver Johnson
Essay’s grade:
Poor
What’s grading
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Expert Review
The essay is not well organized and lacks focus. It is difficult to identify the main point the writer is trying to convey. The writing is also marred by several grammatical errors, spelling errors, and awkward sentence structures. The essay reads like a stream of consciousness without proper transition between the different parts, making it difficult to follow the writer's train of thought. The writer also overuses certain words, such as "very" and "was," which detracts from the quality of the writing. The essay needs significant improvement in almost every aspect to meet the standards of a good essay.
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What can be improved
The essay titled "Childhood Memories: The Best Trips from My Childhood" is a poorly written piece that lacks focus and structure. The writer begins by stating that their happiest moments were in childhood, but they do not develop this idea throughout the essay. The essay meanders from discussing the writer's childhood friends to different trips they took with family and friends, making it difficult to understand the central idea or theme. The sentence structure is awkward and convoluted, with many run-on sentences that could be split into smaller, clearer sentences. The writer also overuses certain words like "very" and "was," which detracts from the quality of the writing. For example, "It was very funny at the time but it was not funny for her or the teachers" could be rewritten as "Although we found it amusing, it was hurtful to the girl and resulted in punishment from the teachers." The essay also has numerous grammatical errors, such as incorrect verb tense and subject-verb agreement. For example, "There is were all of kids love to go because it is like the happiest place on earth because everyong is happy here, you can not see a person that is not happy there" could be rewritten as "Disneyland is where all kids love to go because it is the happiest place on earth, and everyone is always happy there. It is impossible to see anyone who is not happy." The writer needs to improve the organization and structure of the essay by breaking it down into smaller, more manageable sections, each with a clear topic sentence. The essay also needs a central theme or idea to guide the reader through the different parts of the essay. The writer can use transition words and phrases to connect the different sections of the essay, making it more coherent and easier to read. In conclusion, the essay requires significant improvement in almost every aspect, including organization, sentence structure, grammar, and clarity. The writer needs to revise the essay carefully, paying attention to the issues highlighted in this assessment, to produce a high-quality essay that meets the standards of good writing.

Cite this Essay

Childhood Memories: The Best Trips from My Childhood. (2019, April 26). GradesFixer. Retrieved April 24, 2024, from https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/personal-account-the-best-experiences-of-my-life/
“Childhood Memories: The Best Trips from My Childhood.” GradesFixer, 26 Apr. 2019, gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/personal-account-the-best-experiences-of-my-life/
Childhood Memories: The Best Trips from My Childhood. [online]. Available at: <https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/personal-account-the-best-experiences-of-my-life/> [Accessed 24 Apr. 2024].
Childhood Memories: The Best Trips from My Childhood [Internet]. GradesFixer. 2019 Apr 26 [cited 2024 Apr 24]. Available from: https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/personal-account-the-best-experiences-of-my-life/
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