The Importance of Family Values All Over The World

The meaning of family varies from place to place and from culture to culture. Ideally I’ve never thought about what a perfect family would be because every family has a totally different dynamic from the next. If I had to guess, I would say it would be a family that despite everyone’s faults is still able to come together and work to a mutual understanding and agreement based off of everyone’s opinions. Although one all-encompassing definition that describes every type of family across the board does not exist. For instance, in places like China children can be raised apart from their father and mother in a group of women, but still count themselves as a family.

In fact, there are more variations on modern family structure than ever before, including non-traditional families. Some of which are single parent households, blended families, unrelated individuals living cooperatively, and homosexual couples, among others. Unfortunately, family guidelines have been slow to catch up to changing trends in modern lifestyles. Different social orders play formative roles on family life as well. A given culture or society helps to define what values families deem important. There are several ways in which this could be addressed; however the three most commonly seen are financially, behaviorally, and intellectually (cognitively.)

Financially, society affects us by bombarding our families with suggestions for wants and needs that we may or may not be able to afford. These range from housing choices, to schooling choices for college, shopping options, places to go, and things to do for which we would have to invest from our budget. If this constant exposure did not occur, perhaps the family unit would make less biased decisions on how they would spend their dollars.

Intellectually, if education, material acquisition, or spirituality hold specific values they can then help to shape what the family deems as important. At the same time, society helps to form family identity in terms of how the family will represent their own identities and senses of one’s self. If society offers a higher quality of life where our quality is valued, we would make very high-thinking analyses on where we want society to go, and what role we play within it. We also would question how we can help improve the quality of our social status. This would include finding benchmarks, logical foundations, and recent research that would help us make our surroundings both qualitatively and quantitatively sufficient.

Behaviorally, society affects us by the dynamic division of individuals and groups by preferences, race, language, commonalities, religion, and ethnicity. If you live in a place where customs are nowhere like what you are used to, you will behaviorally choose to either join them or radically isolate yourself from the group. Since the latter is not the likeliest choice, chances are that in some way or another, regardless of how independently you live, you will still acquire one or two mannerisms from your immediate social circle such as accent, drawl, idioms, intonations, or customs. Another example of how society shapes family life is that the varied nature of society in terms of representing what is and/ or what should be is something that families make a strong judgment for or against. For example, if society views one particular action or behavior as “incorrect,” the family is poised in a situation where they must choose if they will accept society’s judgment or if they will rebel against it and embrace such action or behavior.

For instance, I myself was raised by parents with values and beliefs on the opposite sides of the spectrum scale. That fact in its self was already a huge barrier within our family dynamic not to mention we were an interracial family in a state where only 2% of its total population is minority. As a child growing up I was ostracized for who I was. It was never like I fit in on either side of my family, because on one side I was to “hood,” but for the other I was too loose or free spirited. I was never enough of the other, and that fault was pinned on the opposing parent which consistently caused a strain on my relationship with the other members of my family. I come from a broken home of abuse, addiction, and divorce, where my parents still after nearly 5 years of separation can never seem to get on the same page. Being the oldest of the four children they’ve had together I have always had the burden of carrying everyone else’s emotional torment and discomfort for the situations we’ve been placed in. My dad being outdatedly old fashion and conservative has placed a humongous wedge in between how we function around each other. My mother being the exact opposite of that is better able to understand my need to dress differently from what would be considered appropriate for my family or be allowed to put holes throughout my body at free will. Socially this key issue was found acceptable by society itself, because it was a creative way of expressing myself without harming others. However for my father this posed an issue because he was raised by parents with southern beliefs and morals leading him to have a more reserved or closed minded opinion of what was acceptable.

Intellectually, my family dynamic is much of the same I’ve already described. In total there are, about four living generations at this point and time. What I’ve noticed is that the higher up I go in age the more closed off or less receptive people tend to become with the exception of a few minority. Another contributing factor to this is the very different upbringings my parents received as children. On one end we have the parent who was brought up in a strict Christian home with the intense values of family and compliance to stay conformed with what your elders thought was acceptable. Then on the other you have the parent who grew up in a single parent home where as a child they had to mature way too early because there was no support system. This played a major role in there adult hood and in how they chose to raise their own children. While both of their separate upbringings played a role in how they created their own family dynamic, so did the different changes in the nature of the way society worked. An example of this would be the need to buy and or have material possessions for my mother. Since growing up she wasn’t provided the luxury of supper nice things or materials, to this day she puts a lot of effort into the newest or latest thing to have weather it be a new gadget, new clothing line, or dishes, etc. Whereas my dad is always the bear minimum and that’s it, he’s big on following structure and the way of those before you. This latter played a huge role into how my parents separated.

Financially, society played a huge role in what we did and what was considered acceptable within my two separate households. I know living with my mom she was always big on presentation and if you have the means to get it then why not have it. Her moto has always been if there’s a will there’s a way. Whereas my father is very reserved. He has always had this perspective that you could only have or achieve certain things if you are considered or maintain a higher levels of status within the social ladder, there’s always been these self-barriers that he nor anyone on his side of the family have yet to be able to overcome. A prime example of this was me going to college so far away from home. Financially everyone was very aware that there would be difficulty paying for my tuition, but my mom and I were very open to the idea or possibility that I would need to take out loans and more than likely get a job to maintain my standard of living and receive an education of high quality simultaneously. Contrary to what many would see when they hear what some of my family has to say about my leaving so far away from home most where rather negative about the subject. This is because they were raised in a time and with the beliefs that it was inappropriate to risk living outside your financial means, even if had the possibility of a greater outcome.

In conclusion families are one of the most essential parts of our society. We never really take the time to contemplate what a huge impact our social surroundings and upbringings have on our daily activities. Intellectually, behaviorally, and financially society plays the biggest roles in our daily lives. Looking back on this essay as an entirety I would say that socially our need to fit in or feel a part of something are probably our greatest push factors to look at what society feels is acceptable. Everyday new things are evolving this includes the different types of families and their dynamics. It is our duty to make sure we keep an open mind and remain flexible while staying true to ourselves through it all.

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