The Ugly Emotion: Envy

Envy is way more than a troublesome emotion. Certain psychologists believe that envy is an emotion that exists from the beginning of life (I.e it’s innate) and must be controlled. I personally believe that it’s an emotion that everybody possesses but to which no one admits. People readily admit to other emotions like anxiety, depression, inferiority, etc, but envy? We don’t admit, not even to ourselves. But above all, we keep our envy a secret from the person whom we envy. No one I have ever known has profited from envy. On the other hand, many have been cursed by envying. Do you remember the Biblical cain? He murdered his brother Abel because of envy. What about Joseph? He was sold by his brothers because of envy.

What really is Envy? Envy is a bitter feeling which arises when we see that another person possesses something that we do not have but would like to have. This feeling makes one desire to see the envied person hurt, disgraced, or toppled from his position. Envy is like cancer which slowly takes over a person’s thinking so that “the envious man feels others’ fortunes are his misfortunes; their profit his loss; their blessing, his bane; their health, his illness; their promotion, his demotion; their success, his failure”. It should be noted that envy isn’t the same as a comparison. Envy involves making comparisons, but to compare is not always to envy. A man can compare himself along with his accomplishments to another man and yet feel no envy. Technically speaking, envy also from begrudging, coveting, emulating and feeling jealousy although these concepts are related, often used together, and sometimes used as synonyms.

Sources of envy

Some psychologists believe that envy is a learned characteristic which children pick up early in life. First, envy is especially prevalent in people who feel they are failures. When a person tries something and doesn’t succeed as he had hoped, he becomes envious of other people who have succeeded. Second, envy is almost always an expression of inferiority. Consciously or unconsciously, the envious person considers himself inferior to other men and he doesn’t like being in this position. Inferiority is often accompanied by the belief that we have been deprived of something which we justly deserve.

Influence of Envy

It affects whole societies. It affects our thinking so that we look for faults in the people whom we envy and rejoice when they fall. It influences our speech and leads us to gossip, criticize and spread rumors that can harm another’s position. It affects our feelings. Our feelings are now characterized by meanness, revenge, delinquency, violence, and even murder or suicide. It’s plain that envy can hinder our getting along with other people. What is worse is that envy separates us from God. God resents envy!

How to control envy

First, understand the nature of envy. Understanding is a basic step in dealing with any problem. When we know what envy is, why it arises and how it affects us, we can be more alert to its dangers, more aware of its scope and better able to rid it from our lives.

Second, we can deal with envy by recognizing its prevalence. Envy is a universal attitude. Everyone struggles with envy. We might as well face that fact, agree that we are not unique or especially despicable and then get on with the job of doing something about our envious feelings.

A third step, one that tends to be overlooked, is that we should rely on divine strength to help us overcome our envy. By ourselves, it is difficult to change envious behavior, but God is powerful.

Works Cited

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