Theories Regarding The Factors Or Components that Comprise Love

There have been several theories regarding the factors or components that comprise love. These theories have emerged in order to understand the nature of one’s experience of love in daily life. The two dominating theories on love are those proposed by John Alan Lee and Robert Sternberg. Lee’s model suggested a model of love composed of six styles, three which are primary, and three that are considered secondary. The primary styles of love are Eros or passionate love, Ludus or game-playing love, and Storge which is friendship-based love. The secondary styles of love are Pragma or practical love, Mania which is possessive love, and Agape which is altruistic love. Lee sought to describe the styles of loving in a relationship as opposed to describing types of individuals in a relationship.

Sternberg’s triangular theory of love suggests that love can be understood in terms of three components which format the three ends of a triangle. At the top of the triangle is intimacy, while passion makes up the bottom left corner of the triangle, and decision/commitment make up the bottom right corner of the triangle. The position of these elements within the triangle is arbitrary. This newer model of love has been shown in research to be more reliable and is more generally accepted, therefore, it is the primary focus of this text. Within this theory, the intimacy component refers to feeling close, connected, and bonded in a relationship.

These feelings make up warmth in a relationship. Passion in romantic relationships refers to the motivations which drive romance, physical attraction, and sexual intercourse. The decision/commitment component are composed of short-term and long-term components, where decision is the choice for one to love another in the short-term and commitment is the long-term maintenance of that love. Within this element are cognitive factors that are part of decision making regarding the choice to commit to a relationship. While love can be separated into components, Sternberg suggests that it is important to not forget about love as a whole when delving deeper into interpretation of each of the components.

The geometry of the “love triangle” is dependent on the amount of love and the balance of love within a relationship. Hence, more love will result in a larger area represented by the triangle. Therefore, the three components interact with and influence one another depending on their presence or absence within a relationship, changing the balance of love. For example, more intimacy may result in more passion or commitment and more commitment can lead to more intimacy or passion. All three components are vital to an interpersonal relationship and give rise to various combinations of love. Specifically, there are 8 possible types of love that arise from different combinations of the three components. These include nonlove, liking, infatuated love, empty love, romantic love, companionate love, fatuous love, and consummate love.

Nonlove is the absence of the three components of love. Liking is characterized by experience of intimacy without passion and commitment. Infatuated love refers to passionate love without intimacy and commitment. This is also described as “love at first sight.” Empty love is the result of the decision to love another and commit to that love without the intimacy and passion. Romantic love results from a combination of intimacy and passion. Companionate love is comprised of a combination of intimacy and the decision/commitment components. Fatuous love is made up of passion and decision/commitment. Commitment here is usually made based on passion, therefore, it may be short-term. Consummate love results from a combination of all three components of love. This type of love is easier to attain than to maintain.

The components of love vary in many ways. The experiences of love discussed are said to change at different stages in a relationship as they each follow a different course once a relationship is initiated. Each of the three components have a different level of importance based on whether the relationship is short-term versus long-term. The components also differ in how common they are in different relationships and in the psychophysiological response that they each produce. Overall, this theory of love has been shown to incorporate several different empirical findings regarding love and relationships. It can therefore be used to explain numerous phenomena regarding people’s experiences of love in everyday life.