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Throughout the course of school, I have never truly felt confident with my English skills. When I first started kindergarten, I did not speak any English and felt out of place, because I didn’t feel like I belonged. As time passed, I became proficient in English and could read at an eleventh-grade level in sixth grade. In middle school I was placed into the honor classes, where there was only three other people of color and I felt out of place. I stayed in honors classes until my sophomore year, throughout my two high school English classes the story hadn’t changed there was a majority of white students. My junior and senior years I was in the “normal” English classes. My experience caused me to feel as though I lack the necessary skills to be in English 5A, I feel as though I need more guidance in research skills, grammar, analyzing text and overall practice writing.
In high school my classes, we were given very limited opportunities to add our own research. I personally do not feel as though I can find reliable research to present to professors. In my very few experiences of research we were allowed to use any information, I realize that using unreliable sources will my professors to not take me seriously. Citing is also a big issue for me, because my teachers always told me to just write the authors name. I know that the way I was taught to cite in nowhere near acceptable in college.
Grammar is something I have struggled with since I can remember, I feel as though that is one of my weakest points because I am not confident in that portion of my writing skills. A majority of my teachers have informed me of this issue, however they failed to give me guidance when I asked how to I could fix my issues. This is one of the main reasons I decided to enroll myself in English 5A, as it was explained “none of us were born knowing how to write academic papers… But we can learn and develop the skills” (Bullock, Goggin pg 45). I want to expand my writing abilities in order to become a better student, in order to succeed. This class was designed to give and enhance students’ knowledge about writing, and that is exactly what I feel that I need.
Another reason I feel I need this class is because I know I need more practice writing and analyzing text. During my senior year we only wrote three essays and was almost always told what exactly to do. By taking this course I want to learn how to be more independent in my writings, develop my own perspectives and put it into writing; this is something, which sadly, was not an experience of mine. I never really received feedback on the work from my teachers, which I feel held me back from growing as a writer. One aspect I struggle with the length of the essay, I can never seem to write enough to fulfil the requirements. Although I truly enjoy reading, I don’t feel as though I take enough time to analyze the text, which is why I struggle when I have to write a paper.
As I had previously mentioned I’m not conferrable writing, this is due to a variety of circumstances. Through this class I hope to target those issues and become a better writer is something. Writing skills are an essential in college, and I don’t want to regret having the opportunity to take a class that will allow me to grow. I believe that by acknowledging my weaknesses, instead of ignoring them, will allow me to grow in this class. But in all honesty writing frightens me, because I feel as though I am doing everything wrong, I want to reach the point where I don’t feel anxiety when I have to write a paper.
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