Choosing a Proper Parenting Style

Parenting is more complicate than we imagine. It is difficult to get balance on too permissive and too authoritarian, right? Which kind of child-rearing style are you?If your child told you, he doesn’t want to do homework. How would you respond? A: “You can do whatever you like. ” C: “Now you have to finish the homework, otherwise you can’t do anything else. “ D “I hope you can finish your homework because it is your responsibility. If you have trouble doing your homework, you can ask me for help. ” Which one is your answer? And which respond you think is the best? Let’s discuss each styles in turn. If you are a child, how do you feel when your parents told you, “You can do whatever you like. ”

First impression, I feel happy. I can do what I like. Little by little, I feel rank low in happiness. I feel that I am not valued and neglected. Emotionally detached and withdrawn of uninvolved child rearing style parent acceptance and involvement will lead child display many problem, such as despair, annoyed, antisocial behavior and school achievement difficulties. ( Aunola, Stattin, & Nurmi, 2000; Kurdek& Fine, 1994; Schroeder et. , 2010). When I was young, I don’t want to do homework. My parents always tell me “Now you have to finish the homework, otherwise you can’t do anything else. “They seldom listen to my opinions. They won’t think about the reason that I don’t want to do homework. “Do it because I said so!” is their attitude. Authoritarian parent is engages in forcible behavioral control. For long periods of time, the children are more likely to be worried, sad, and low in self-reliance and self-esteem. (Laura E. Berk, 2013)

However, under by authoritarian parents’ engage in coercive behavioral, child becomes much more well-behaved and has better moral compass than peers. (Steinberg, Blatt- Eisengart, & Cauffman,2006)It doesn’t matter even the authoritarian child rearing style is imperfect. Authoritative child rearing can make it been more perfectly. The authoritative child rearing is the most successful way, it draw in high acceptance and involvement, adjusting control techniques, and suitable autonomy granting. (Laura E. Berk, 2013) When I was mad of the homework, your parent tell you “I hope you can finish your homework because it is your responsibility. If you have trouble doing your homework, you can ask me for help. ” I feel warm, attentive, and sensitive to my needs. It can draw the relationship of parent-child into close connection. They put a strong focus on the maturity appropriateness which is to give reasons for their expectations toward children. Authoritative parents will involve disciplinary encounters, such as “teaching moments” in order to promote children’s self-regulation, as well as to know where they are and what they are doing.

Authoritative parenting is related to various aspects either towards to children, teenagers or adolescence, which is a life-long effect to a person. For example, self-control, academic performance, responsiveness to parents’ views, task persistence, as well as the social and moral development. Children are like a seed and need to be taken care of, just as you often tell your child, “Put a lot of effort, you will bring up some unexpected quests. ” Add more patience, add more care, and enjoy the interaction between with your kids. Childhood is so fleeting and precious, live it up with your family!