Determination Determines Your Destination

I'm the type of person who never rests unless I reach my goal, once I set my mind on something I have to make it happen. I was first introduced to the English language (as a third language) at the age of 11 (5th grade), and fell in love with it right away. It has always been my favorite subject at school. Learning this language has always been a never-ending journey for me. I acquire new vocabulary every day, from the different T.V shows that I watch or from the "BBC" or "Bloomberg" radio stations. Whenever I encounter a new phrase/word, I would immediately write it down, this is why my essay might sound colloquial rather than formal, it's been a long time since the last time I wrote an academic essay. Ever since Junior high, I used to hear about all sort of students exchange programs, wishing I could participate in one of them, but unfortunately, all those wishes were rejected by my parents.

Eventually, I gave up asking, but never gave up the idea. Every year, for over a decade now, I would make a list of all relevant programs to the US, print them, dig up information about them, fantasize about joining one of them… And that was it. Never had the courage to go through with it, fearing my parents' disapproval. Life went on, or so my parents thought. When it came to choosing an academic major, I was a bit lost. Had I known myself the way I do today, I would have chosen English right away, without "wasting" 5 years of my life. A few years went by. Now I'm an English teacher. I love my current jobs; one of them is actually one of my dream jobs. My ultimate career goals have always been to work as a higher education lecturer/teacher. Applying for the FLTA program can provide me with this opportunity and much more. It would also help me get more acquainted with the American culture. To elaborate more on my primary job - teacher at Albashaer school; this school is one of the best schools in the Arab sector, we only accept student with high levels of achievement, therefore, goes without saying that teachers are also hand-picked.

Our English staff, for example, consists of 5 teachers, all but me have spent at least a year in the USA, and I feel as if they somehow gain advantage over me due to that. Even if my students think (at the beginning of the school year), that I'm a native speaker of English, and keep asking me questions like how many years did I spend in the U.S (which I honestly enjoy playing along with, I don't confirm their assumptions, but don't deny them either). I would really appreciate it if you could grant me this life changing experience. It would boost my self-confidence as an English teacher. Furthermore, it'd help me with my private business and would open new doors as well. I hope you won't think of me as a self-centered person, in light of the above. It is just that whenever I choose to be part of something; first, it'd be something I'm really passionate about, and second, I have to stand out, not fond of mediocrity. On a more personal level; my birthday is on the 24th of July, and I have forgotten how it's like to celebrate or enjoy one of those.

My father never wished me a happy birthday. I always thought it's because he's not into those things and it's who he is. But as it turned out, to him this date is nothing but a reminder of his unmarried daughter's age. Whenever somebody makes a reference to my singleness (which happens repeatedly), my father would turn to me and say "don't forget that next month/this July… you'll turn ___," making me wish my assumption about him forgetting the date was the correct one. Why am I sharing this personal information? Well, as I mentioned earlier, I'm not the giving up type. I'm not getting married for the sake of it or for the sake of my parents' happiness, tried to go that road once and it didn't work out for me, it only made me more determined to achieve what I truly want. For a few months I tried to mention the "staying in the U.S for a year" thing to guys I met, and they all made it clear that such thing is out of question. So I am well aware now that being in a serious relationship would make me give up my goal, which will affect every other aspect of my life (what I've been experiencing for the past decade).

As a result, I gave up dating, which eventually led to my parents approval, they know I'm not backing down from my decision this time. Not only that, but they also wished me luck when I took the TOEFL exam. To conclude, I'd say that "Carpe Diem" is my new approach to life. I'm going to seize my days and embrace all opportunities. Done living up to others' expectations. Time to woman up.