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Admission to The University of Adelaide: Describe Your Background

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About this sample

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Words: 1443 |

Pages: 3|

8 min read

Published: Jan 14, 2021

Essay grade:
Satisfactory
arrow downward Read Review

Words: 1443|Pages: 3|8 min read

Published: Jan 14, 2021

Essay grade:
Satisfactory
arrow downward Read Review

Table of contents

  1. Family Status
  2. Academics and Achievements
  3. Work Experience
  4. Why Australia
  5. The People
    The Educational System
    Recreational Opportunities
  6. Why University of Adelaide
  7. Career Goals
  8. Works Cited:

Mahatma Gandhi has said that “The future depends on what you do today.” and I personally believe that, “From thousands of species, Humankind is only the species on the earth that thinks about its future”. We are created to do something good and worthy in our life. We have travelled from darkness to light, from illiteracy to literacy and Now, from Intelligence Quotient (IQ) to Emotional Quotient (EQ). Humans have the tendency to observe, learn and achieve.

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My name is Kartikey Panthri, originally from Uttarakhand stateknown as “Gods own Country” but was born & brought up in New Delhi. I am adaptive, hardworking, patient and possess good leadership qualities and I think these are some of my strengths. I have learned that long-term goals are best achieved when I break them into shorter goals. My short-term goal is to gain skill and knowledge to achieve my long term goal. That’s why I chose overseas education to fulfil my dream. I am a very sporty person, I always try to remain active and my strength is my punctuality and ability to gain more and more knowledge and that makes me adequate for the challenges of the world. I believe the world is going through a phase of revolution, and it’s important to be up to date regarding new technologies. My mind is very sharp at grasping technological aspects of anything therefore that makes working on technological spectrum a piece of cake for me.

My family consists of 5 members – My Father, Mother, Grandfather, Grandmother and me. My father is retired from private sector and my mother is working as an Assistant commissioner of Police in Delhi Police. Although, being from middle-class family my parents have never ever restricted me from flying high instead they have increased height of the sky. I can say that what I am right now, holding whichever qualities in myself, is by observing my parents doing their household work and behaviour of them with others in day-to-day life of theirs. Like every child, my parents are the teachers for life in a true way. They have taught me art of living, moral values, honesty, truthfulness, and how to be loyal to someone for the betterment of the life of mine.

Family Status

In India we have immovable property which is worth 4-5 crore INR, as I am the only child of my parents, I have all the responsibility for which Imust come back to India. My parents have taken an educational loan for my higher studies for which I will first try to recover and earn in Australia then would like to return back to India, so that one day I can start my own construction group.

Academics and Achievements

Talking about my educational background, I did my secondary education from St. Francis De Sales School, Janakpuri New Delhi with 8 CGPA and senior secondary education from St. Cecilia’s public school with 79.6 % with non–medical stream both under C.B.S.E board. After clearing my 12th I got enrolled for the 4yr integrated program from 2013-2017 for my B. Tech (Civil engineering) fromG.D GoenkaUniversity, Gurgaon with 7.92 CGPA.

Since I am a sportsman, I played football and basketball for school team. In college I was selected for the University football and swimming team. I am also a 10m air pistol shooter. With all this I have learned executed qualities like leadership, hard work, patience, team managementetc.

Work Experience

While pursuing my Under-Graduate course I have also undergone 10 weeks of Industrial Exposure Training in Delhi Metro Rail Corporation Ltd, New Delhi

After completing my bachelor’s degree, I started my career with Leighton India Contractors Pvt. Ltd. as Engineer (Civil), where my job was to oversee implementation of the engineering controls onsite with the objective of meeting the schedule and quality objectives of the project. My site isAAROHAN Residencies inGurgaon, Haryana which is a Residential project of VIPUL.

Why Australia

Having done my education till bachelor’s from Indian education system made me feel that the practical application of theoretical concepts is still lacking in a large segment of Indian classrooms. Lecturers fail to make the classes interesting, which can be brought alive through adopting an interactive approach and use of modern technology

Australia is a country which is rich in culture, technology, and it has the great environment for an individual’s development not only in the educational field but also for the interpersonal development.

My family has also supported me with my decision to go to Australia as the focus there is more on assignments and skill development. International students can work part time to develop hand on skills. I personally love Australia more due to the below mentioned reasons:

The People

Australian people are one of the most amazing, loving, and welcoming people that one will ever meet. Even if someone is a stranger, a native Australian treats them like a friend. They love meeting new people, the culture is quite laid back and easy going. The diversity is greater than one would see in many European countries.

The Educational System

This is one of the most important reasons to go to Australia. First, the tuition fee is affordable and lower as compared to many other countries in the world. The degrees are recognized around the world apart from being up-to-date and practical study based. Students get a high quality, hands on education that they deserve. The support services for international students are among the best in the world. They have a lot of expertise and experience in helping international students so that they can succeed in their programs.

Recreational Opportunities

There are amazing opportunities available for anyone who looks for adventure. In Australia, there are a manyopportunities whether it is about hiking, mountaineering or water sports.Australian beaches are world famous and there are many other places which are known to be attractive and traveler friendly.

Why University of Adelaide

During my research I went to several educational fairs and got counseling done from experts in this field. I was very well guided and was given brief information about university and course options. After a lot of research, I finalized my option as University of Adelaide.I wish to pursue Master of Construction Management, but I do not find such an excellent atmosphere in India.

While searching for an appropriate education provider for my desired course I did a lot of research and compared several universities in Sydney & Melbourne. While comparing I found out that Swinburne, Deakin and university of Adelaide provide Master of Construction Management which suits my profile. So, I chose University of Adelaide as the fees of the university seemed to be affordable.

I have decided to do Master of Construction Management which is a 2 years program and I am supposed to complete the course withnot less than 48 units. This specialization will expose me to management theory and complements this with direct engagement to real world cases, practices and environments. This course provides a balance of construction management practices that are applicable in multicultural and international environments. In this course apart from studying subjects like Business and contract legal studies, Development and construction, Cost planning and management, managing project and systemic risks, Leadership of organisationsetc., it will also be preparing us forskills like critical thinking, teamwork, cultural intelligence, problem solving and effective communication skills to enable me to work across international industries.

My decision of studying Master of construction management from university of Adelaide is a correct choice because it will provide me a strong focus on design and development of international entrepreneurial skills and team working skills for management, so after the completion of my course I will come back to my home country as I will have relevant, up- to-date skills and knowledge that employers are looking for. I will have career opportunities and could find employment in many industries, such as engineering, construction, government, builder, etc.

I believe that the university will help me to evolve into a better professional and accomplished my dreams. I am confident that I would meet your educational standards. I hope I will be favorably considered for admission for graduate study.

Career Goals

As I’m doing Master of Construction Management, I expect myself to work under a construction company or firm as a Construction Manager and showcase my talent on both design as well as management field.

I would definitely want to return to my home country after 2-3 years of completion of my course because according to me studying in Australia and gaining international perspective in the field is very important, so that when I return to my home country I will be able to expand the boundaries of construction industry in India, as India is a developing country expanding itself more and more into construction.

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In conclusion, I find that your University offers the pre-requisites needed to achieve my goals in life. The work experience, research training that I will acquire during the course of this program will help me to get a head start in my career. I feel confident that my background would help me make the most of our program and unleash my true potential. I look forward to being strong addition to your department. I hope that this brief statement has given you a better idea of my abilities, experience and interests. I am very confident that if I get an opportunity to be part of that intellectually environment, I am sure that my talents will be put to optimal use.

Works Cited:

  1. American Psychiatric Association. (2017). What Is Depression? Retrieved from https://www.psychiatry.org/patients-families/depression/what-is-depression
  2. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2018). Depression. Retrieved from https://www.cdc.gov/mentalhealth/depression/index.htm
  3. Chowdhury, E. A., Richardson, J. D., Holman, G. D., Tsintzas, K., Thompson, D., & Betts, J. A. (2016). The causal role of breakfast in energy balance and health: a randomized controlled trial in lean adults. The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, 103(3), 747-756.
  4. Fryar, C. D., Carroll, M. D., & Afful, J. (2020). Prevalence of overweight, obesity, and severe obesity among adults aged 20 and over: United States, 1960–1962 through 2017–2018. NCHS Health E-Stat. Retrieved from https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/hestat/obesity-adult-17-18/obesity-adult.htm
  5. Hayes, J. F., Pitman, A., Marston, L., Walters, K., Geddes, J. R., & King, M. (2015). Self-harm, unintentional injury, and suicide in bipolar disorder during maintenance mood stabilizer treatment: a UK population-based electronic health records study. JAMA Psychiatry, 72(7), 635-643.
  6. Kivimäki, M., Singh-Manoux, A., Virtanen, M., Ferrie, J. E., Batty, G. D., Tabak, A. G., ... & Goldberg, M. (2009). Common mental disorder and obesity: insight from four repeat measures over 19 years: prospective Whitehall II cohort study. British Medical Journal, 339, b3765.
  7. Kuczmarski, M. F., Kuczmarski, R. J., & Najjar, M. (2001). Effects of age on validity of self-reported height, weight, and body mass index: findings from the Third National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, 1988-1994. Journal of the American Dietetic Association, 101(1), 28-34.
  8. Luppino, F. S., de Wit, L. M., Bouvy, P. F., Stijnen, T., Cuijpers, P., Penninx, B. W., & Zitman, F. G. (2010). Overweight, obesity, and depression: a systematic review and meta-analysis of longitudinal studies. Archives of General Psychiatry, 67(3), 220-229.
  9. Mental Health Foundation. (2019). How to manage and reduce stress.
  10. World Health Organization. (2021). Obesity and overweight. Retrieved from https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/obesity-and-overweight
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This essay was graded by
Dr. Oliver Johnson
Essay’s grade:
Satisfactory
What’s grading
minus plus
Expert Review
The structure and subject matter of this essay are strong. The author does a good job of describing their background and explaining why they are interested in attending the University of Adelaide. The sentence structure and grammar are generally sound, although there are a few minor errors. The author's voice is clear and their enthusiasm for the subject matter comes through. Overall, this is a solid essay that effectively communicates the author's background and interest in attending the University of Adelaide.
minus plus
What can be improved
The essay "Admission to The University of Adelaide: Describe Your Background" is well-structured and coherent. However, there are a few shortcomings that could be addressed to improve the quality of the essay. One issue is the use of informal language. For instance, the author uses the word "stuff" to describe their academic interests. This word choice is too casual and detracts from the formal tone of the essay. To address this issue, the author should replace "stuff" with a more formal term, such as "subjects" or "fields of study." Another issue is the use of repetitive phrasing. For example, the author writes, "I have always been passionate about learning new things and exploring different ideas." This sentence appears twice in the essay, which can be distracting for the reader. To improve the flow of the essay, the author should vary their language and avoid repeating the same phrases. Finally, the author could provide more specific examples to support their claims. For instance, they state that they are "an active participant in various extracurricular activities," but do not provide any details about these activities. To make their essay more compelling, the author should provide concrete examples of their involvement in extracurricular activities and how it has shaped their interests and goals. Overall, with some minor adjustments, the essay has the potential to be a strong piece of writing that effectively communicates the author's background and interest in attending the University of Adelaide.

Cite this Essay

Admission To The University Of Adelaide: Describe Your Background. (2021, May 14). GradesFixer. Retrieved July 19, 2024, from https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/introduction-and-family-background/
“Admission To The University Of Adelaide: Describe Your Background.” GradesFixer, 14 May 2021, gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/introduction-and-family-background/
Admission To The University Of Adelaide: Describe Your Background. [online]. Available at: <https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/introduction-and-family-background/> [Accessed 19 Jul. 2024].
Admission To The University Of Adelaide: Describe Your Background [Internet]. GradesFixer. 2021 May 14 [cited 2024 Jul 19]. Available from: https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/introduction-and-family-background/
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