Perfectionism is Destroying People

First, what do we mean with perfectionism? Some might say it is all about Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), but Google said it is the incapability to be happy with something until it is perfect, without any flaws whatsoever. Person who have this kind of habit that relates with illusion might seems good to us but soon or later it will be troublesome and irritates for us in handling them and it even can cause stress not just us but that person also. There is no wrong or right to be a perfectionism as long as it is good to your mental and health and other people also. Besides, millennial nowadays who aged between 18 to 35 have a greater chance of having perfectionism as their biggest weakness. Here I will include three effects of perfectionism such as hurting our self-confidence and body image, destroying our relationship and feelings of isolation.

First thing first, as we grow up we tend to hurt our self-confidence and body image just to make sure we are fit in the community. According to Reinhardt, D. in The Body Image Centre, the obsession of having a perfect body might falsely publicized figment of someone’s imagination. As an example, we can see men love to build their body to show up their muscles and six packs until it suits with their perfectionism state. This is all start when they started comparing their body with others. This is clearly not a good way in promoting their body image because they are forcing their selves and their comfort zone to be like them and it might give disappointment to them if they fail to do that. Besides, if they are critically in making sure everything is perfect starts from the smallest to the biggest thing, they might have less self-confidence because they can not even trust their selves with any arrangement or works they have done without having any flaws.

Next, perfectionism can destroy their relationship with anyone with just their acting or habit. According to Springer, S, H., striving to become the "perfect" partner is neither possible nor desirable because some strong perfectionist traits usually prevent healthy relationship formation. They usually love to become a leader in perfecting their relationship and correcting any mistakes. A good relationship needs each partner to have the power to speak and help each other and not ordering or forcing their partner what to do. If this perfectionist kept making their own way, their partners will start to feel left out or do not have the power to speak or act and these lead to the destroying of a relationship. Besides, perfectionist sometimes felt like that they do not need to talk about their personal fears, insecurities and disappointments with others including their life partner to make sure they always feel strong and good in controlling their emotions.

Last but not least, through social media we can easily get the feelings of isolation with just one click. According to Buchanan, D., majority of the millennials showed signs of “multidimensional perfectionism” which means perfectionism driven by unrealistically high expectations. By the age of 15, teenagers might be influenced with perfectionism when it comes to social media. In fact, this is commonly happened among girls’ teenagers as they are easy to feel envy with other people’s achievements or even life. For instance, through Instagram, they love comparing each other by having a good and interesting feed. They even will make sure every photo is perfectly taken and have same photo’s effect to gain more followers until they feel satisfied with it. If they fail to reach their high expectations, they will start to feel isolate from the social media and the worst is it can lead to the depression.

To sum up, hurting our self-confidence and body image, relationship damages and feelings of isolation are the causes of perfectionism that should not be practice to ourselves. Even though perfectionism is great since it allows us to set out high purpose to accomplish our goals or dreams but they also easily to face with the failure because they tend to set their own standard that maybe can not be reach out by human. We as a future generation must avoid not to be too perfectionist because mistakes help us to learn something good from it. There are many ways to reduce their perfectionism’s life but before that they must set their new mentality towards life by start thinking a new direction such as think your flaws and imperfections are what make you unique or mistakes are a normal part of everyday life. I believe they will get a chance to change even it takes time.