The Art of Excelling in School: a Satirical Approach

Have you ever felt like school was impossible to pass? I know I have and over a billion other students agree with me. Failing classes is the leading cause of parent punishments throughout the world. My proposal to fix this problem is to always wait until the last minute to get assignments done. I know that by doing this your students / childs’ grades will dramatically rise. Once you start using this method I’m sure that you’ll be proud and everyone in América will use this method.

I am absolutely positive this will work because you will be procrastinating. Which is key to success, procrastination drives you to work harder and focus. I’m sure you notice that when teachers and parents tell students to get their work done ahead of time they just take longer. This is because we teens have a million other assignments to finish and i’d rather stab my eye out than do work on time. We wait until the last minute and we end up always passing. I know I do and it’s all do to procrastination.

We teens have fifty million hours of homework to do each night. That’s why when we procrastinate we always feel accomplished. When we procrastinate and wait to do our assignments, we feel a sense of accomplishment and feel successful just for completing it on time. Sure we may take an eternity just to turn it in, but the truth is it’s all worth it in the end. That satisfaction we get feels so good it should just never end. I mean how could someone not just enjoy the feeling of excitement when you turn it in, in a nick of time. I mean students must balance schoolwork, homework, clubs, sleep, and a social life which is a hard task to do.

Another way to look at is, if a student were to study everything last minute before the test they would remember it all because they just looked at it. You could study it days before though that would only lead to confusion. Waiting until the last minute is EXTREMELY helpful when it comes to literally everything in life even studying. As seen this is what all students everywhere do. I even do it and it never leads to failure.

In conclusion, make sure you pay attention in class. You should pay attention because you then won’t feel the need to wait until the last minute. You will know when everything is due and how to do it. Your assignments can be turned in on time and you could finish early. All while being prepared, just look at it this way when you pay attention and finish ahead of time, you get more freedom to do what you want. This is why it’s important to pay attention because you never know when it’s really going to count.