The Debate Over Strict Parenting: Rearing Children

Many parents think that strict parenting is the best way to discipline the children and make them obedient. Parents think that it will help their children to become better people for the future, but strict parenting also comes with some disadvantages as well. If parents appear as strict, children look up to them and see them as some kind of boss instead of friends and this fact can really disturb the strength within a family. It also locks a caring and open relationship. So I ask you is being a strict parent good or bad approach to parenting?

My first couple of arguments will be out of a negative approach towards strict parenting, and what sorts of harm this can cause your child. First of all if a child perceives the parent as strict they will not want to have an open relationship with the parent, and will hide away all sorts of things the child has done which they think is unacceptable, which concludes in a relationship with bad trust. Every time the child has a problem the child will choose to face the problems alone, because he/she could possibly think there will be some sort of punishment if he/she were to tell the truth. Most children will fear strict parents and in my opinion that's the worst thing a family can deal with.

Strict parenting can also lead to a lower self esteem for the child. Strict parenting usually comes along with critics. What I mean by that is that children's thoughts or feelings that do not go along with their parents views shall be punished which will make him/her believe that they are not good enough. Strict parenting most likely also means obsession and could possibly give an opposite effect; the children will do anything to finally get free. This is greatly shown especially with teenagers. Whether you like it or not, they will start to rebel against you. Children need to feel that their own will is accepted. Parents must let their children make their own decisions and learn from them. If parents structure a kids life and they feel like they have no free will, they will disobey that parent.

There are numerous ways that prove how strict parenting affects the child negatively however there is also a good side to strict parenting. Children who have been raised with strict parents tend to be more disciplined and even better results in school. These children have been raised to know their duties and they know what’s expected of them and what to do. Strict parenting will also help your children integrate into society. Polite and disciplined people are highly respected and accepted in society. This refers to both adults and children.

We can clearly understand that there are disadvantages of strict parenting but also meaningful and important benefits of a strict childhood. One common question is: Does this mean we have to choose if we want our kids to be disciplined and high achieving or do we want a strong, caring and open relationship with our children? To be honest, I would say no, because I strongly believe that the ultimate parents are those who find a unique balance between the both parts.