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The Influence of Grandmother on My Life

About this sample

About this sample

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Words: 715 |

Pages: 2|

4 min read

Published: Mar 18, 2021

Essay grade:
Satisfactory
arrow downward Read Review

Words: 715|Pages: 2|4 min read

Published: Mar 18, 2021

Essay grade:
Satisfactory
arrow downward Read Review

Growing up is one of the toughest things in life. We all must path that will help us as we grow older. There would be times when we will not make the right decision which we would later regret in our life for a lifetime. And one person who has taught me to respect and learn to be a better person is my grandmother. I can use this chance to thank my grandma and she is the one who I look up to and the one that who persuaded me. And so, she is the one that I like to share about for my personal essay.

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When I was younger, I was very close with my grandma, and even until now. She had become my inspiration since I was in grade one. During that time, I was so determined to follow her footsteps and follow her teaching and remembered it so that I’ll use it in the future. I still remembered when I was in India and was in grade 4; I did badly in my tests. So, I decided to hide it from my parents and even impersonate my father’s signature and hand in my tests to my teacher. However, I wasn’t fortunate and got caught. I got scolded badly and they grounded me too. As my parent’s finish yelling at me, my grandma told me that they wouldn’t have scolded me if I showed them the test instead of signing myself. This made me realize that I had to change myself and if she has not told me that It was wrong, I won’t be able to realize it myself. I listened to her and changed my attitude into a better kid.

I’m about to have my grade 4 exam soon, and I just didn’t bother to study and was playing video games, when my grandma told me that its time for me to study, she said: you wouldn’t want to be scolded by your parents again would you? And then she told me that they aren’t scolding me because it is benefiting them, this is for my education which will help me succeed in life and have a bright future. I decided to go study and after the exam, I found out that I did great in all the subjects and we went out to celebrate. I was a happy person that day and gave me a big confidence boost. The person who I thought couldn’t happen, all changed as soon as I did great on the exam.

My grandmother was the one who has always taught to never give on your dream and whatever you like in doing it and don’t give up hope. After grade 5, I came to Canada and still remember those days today, as I am in high school. I was just having the time of my life. Enjoying all the time I can. However, I struggled throughout elementary school and was even an “applied” student once I joined high school because the teachers thought I wouldn’t succeed if I take “academic” level courses. Once I reached high school everyone thought I wasn’t smart enough to do the academic level courses so to prove them all wrong, I took summer school and changed all my programs to academic and even got honor roll but it is all because of my wonderful grandmother who gave me the motivation to do all this. She tells me to have more confidence in myself and be proud of what I have done and always end it with a smile. She has really made me what I am today. And now, I have been accepted to Ryerson University, and its all through hard work and motivation.

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In conclusion, my grandmother had influenced me in many ways and different ways to built me up to be a better person. It been many years now, since I was born, and my grandmother have also been there for me and help me through all the negative problems. She has a very good personality and a love to communicate with people. I believe that if I have her influences and I will always succeed. I will always appreciate her existence in my life and always love her as much as I can. Hard work and motivation bring success.

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This essay was graded by
Dr. Oliver Johnson
Essay’s grade:
Satisfactory
What’s grading
minus plus
Expert Review
The essay "The Influence of Grandmother on My Life" is a heartwarming personal narrative. The writer uses personal anecdotes to describe the positive impact their grandmother has had on their life. However, the essay would benefit from improvements in organization and grammar. The writer should create clear topic sentences to introduce each paragraph and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus. The essay would also benefit from further editing for grammar and sentence structure, particularly in regards to verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement. Additionally, the writer should work on developing their voice to make the essay more engaging and expressive.
minus plus
What can be improved
While "The Influence of Grandmother on My Life" is a touching personal narrative, there are several areas in which the essay could be improved. The organization of the essay is somewhat disjointed, with paragraphs that lack clear topic sentences and a logical progression of ideas. For example, the second paragraph jumps from the writer's relationship with their grandmother to a specific incident involving academic dishonesty, without a clear transition or explanation of how the incident relates to the essay's overall theme. To improve the essay's organization, the writer should create clear topic sentences for each paragraph that introduce the main idea or theme, and ensure that each paragraph is focused on that idea or theme. The essay also needs further editing for grammar and sentence structure. There are several instances where verb tense consistency is an issue, such as when the writer switches from past tense to present tense within the same sentence. Additionally, subject-verb agreement is not always consistent, such as in the sentence "Once I reached high school everyone thought I wasn’t smart enough to do the academic level courses." To improve the essay's grammar, the writer should read through the essay carefully to identify any issues with tense or agreement, and make appropriate corrections. Finally, the essay could benefit from further development of the writer's voice. While the writer conveys their appreciation for their grandmother's influence, there is not much variation in tone or expression throughout the essay. To improve the essay's voice, the writer should experiment with different ways of expressing their emotions and experiences, such as incorporating dialogue or using descriptive language to create a more vivid image of their memories.

Cite this Essay

The Influence Of Grandmother On My Life. (2021, March 18). GradesFixer. Retrieved April 22, 2024, from https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/the-influence-of-grandmother-on-my-life/
“The Influence Of Grandmother On My Life.” GradesFixer, 18 Mar. 2021, gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/the-influence-of-grandmother-on-my-life/
The Influence Of Grandmother On My Life. [online]. Available at: <https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/the-influence-of-grandmother-on-my-life/> [Accessed 22 Apr. 2024].
The Influence Of Grandmother On My Life [Internet]. GradesFixer. 2021 Mar 18 [cited 2024 Apr 22]. Available from: https://gradesfixer.com/free-essay-examples/the-influence-of-grandmother-on-my-life/
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