The Power of Forgiveness: Healing and Transformation

Introduction

Have you ever felt afflicted by the action of another? Did you feel the need to retaliate in order to move on or did you feel understanding towards your transgressor? Forgiveness requires one to choose to eliminate vengeance and resentment (Mayo Clinic Staff, 2017). Forgiveness occurs in various circumstances throughout life and is important in the development of a person and of society as a whole. Although giving forgiveness can be seen as neglecting the wrongdoer’s deed, the power of forgiveness improves mental and physical health, betters one’s relationship with others, and provides spiritual well-being for both positions of the conflict. Therefore, forgiveness should be given.

Misconceptions About Forgiveness

Many misconceptions are made about what forgiveness is and what forgiveness is not. As reported by Bob Enright, professor of educational psychology at the University of Wisconsin, genuine forgiveness bids empathy and consideration regarding the transgressor and is not equivalent to restorative justice (Weir, 2017). Absolution is not a symptom of weakness, but rather shows strength in the victim for their ability to let go of grievances. As stated in one academic journal, forgiveness is commonly perceived as a characteristic of strength and ethics (Cosgrove and Konstam, 2008).

The Benefits of Forgiveness

Forgiveness reaps benefits health-wise. When faced with adverse situations one develops feelings of anger and resentment. Anger leads to increased levels of stress causing deleterious effects to one’s physical health. Yoichi Chida, MD, PhD found in his meta-analysis that anger increases possibilities of cardiac infarction and intensifies the effects of previously existing heart illnesses (Weir, 2017). In addition, according to a health article, forgiveness leads to a lower risk of heart attack, lower blood pressure, improved cholesterol, and fewer mental health issues (“Forgiveness: Your Health Depends on It”). It can be inferred that forgiveness grants physical and mental health benefits.

Furthermore, forgiveness improves relationships. Whether in cases of affairs or conflicts with coworkers, forgiveness can relieve tension built from resentment or sentiments of vengeance. In fact, one study conveyed forgiveness-based therapy produced positive changes in marital connection (Ripley and Worthington, 2002). The focus of this study is that forgiveness is fundamental in any type of relationship. Unforgiveness can affect one’s connection with others negatively by creating a blockade of resentment and/or grievance. However, this does not mean to overlook the actions of the wrongdoer but rather recognize the offense and advise them to learn from their mistakes. In another article, researchers affirm that compliance in forgiveness is vital to relationships because it encourages the individual to surrender feelings of vengeance and animosity (Cosgrove and Konstam, 2008). When an individual abandons the aforementioned sentiments, it opens means for reconciliation.

In addition, forgiveness enhances the spiritual well-being of both parties involved. Research explains how forgiving individuals are likely to carry reduced signs of neuroticism (Weir, 2017). Individuals who have high degrees of neuroticism experience feelings of moodiness, envy, guilt, frustration, and loneliness. Likewise, being unforgiving can bring feelings that life has no meaning or that one is discordant with one’s spiritual faith. Forgiveness allows means for emotional and spiritual healing and can derive power away from the wrongdoer (Mayo Clinic Staff, 2017). When one gives forgiveness they are putting the power into their own hands which can increase one’s self-esteem and overall boost their spiritual prosperity.

Power of Forgiveness in Literature and Real Life

The theme of forgiveness can be seen in the work of literature, “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof” by Tennessee Williams. When Brick refuses to forgive Maggie for her affair with Skipper, a tension builds between them and their relationship suffers immensely. The consequences that occur from the lack of forgiveness are significant. Brick’s drinking addiction starts after the death of Skipper, which he believes is Maggie’s fault, and worsens until Big Daddy forces the couple to resolve the conflict. When forgiveness is finally given towards the end of the drama their relationship heals and becomes healthy. The lesson learned here is forgiveness is necessary in relationships in order to relieve tension and proceed to build the connection between individuals.

A real word example of forgiveness can be examined in the events of the bombing of Pearl Harbour and the atomic bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. When the Japanese launched a surprise attack on Pearl Harbour U.S citizens were devastated and enraged. Unforgivingly, the U.S. showed no mercy when they released two atomic bombs in Japan causing calamitous results. One might think the two nations would never be without hostility again due to the detrimental strife. However, following World War II, the San Francisco Peace Treaty ended the war and Japan became an ally of the United States. This is significant because it exemplifies how both nations were able to forgive each other and resolve their rivalry. Equally important, Japan and the U.S. today consider each other great companions and are both economically thriving. If it weren’t for the critical decision of forgiveness, violence between the countries would continue causing more harm than good.

One might argue that forgiveness neglects the transgressor’s actions or even justifies the malevolent deed. While this may seem true, forgiveness is not “brushing off” what the wrongdoer has done or saying what they have done is “okay”. Forgiveness allows the victim to confront the transgressor and recognize that what they have done is wrong, therefore creating an understanding to ensure the wrongdoing does not repeat itself. In support of this, an interview conducted with Reverend Michael Waters, founding pastor of Joy Tabernacle and Agape Temple African Methodist Episcopal Church, expresses that forgiveness is about reconciliation with the wrongdoer despite recognition of the offense (“Barbershop: Botham Jean, Amber Guyer, and Forgiveness”).

Conclusion

In the final analysis, forgiveness yields the power to cause positive properties in one’s life. Multiple works of evidence indicate the essentiality to practice forgiveness in order to bring about beneficial factors in one’s health, relationships, and spirituality. Due to these reasons, forgiveness should be granted in advantage for both the transgressor and transgressed.

Works Cited

1. Cosgrove, Lisa, and Mark Konstam. “Forgiveness: A New Paradigm for Healing and Growing.” Behavioral Medicine, vol. 34, no. 3, 2008, pp. 107-115.
2. Mayo Clinic Staff. “Forgiveness: Letting Go of Grudges and Bitterness.” Mayo Clinic, 2017, www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/forgiveness/art-20047692.
3. Ripley, Jennifer S., and Everett L. Worthington Jr. “Hope-focused and Forgiveness-based Group Interventions to College Students’ Grade Point Averages.” Journal of College Student Development, vol. 43, no. 3, 2002, pp. 403-413.
4. Weir, Kirsten. “The Power of Forgiveness.” American Psychological Association, July/August 2017, www.apa.org/monitor/2017/07-08/power-forgiveness.