The Reasons Why Modern Generation Delays in Getting Married

As reported in Paired Life (2016) “Marriage has been a part of human culture for thousands of years and almost all cultures and religions on the planet have some sort of partnership ceremony”. But now we all can notice that getting married is becoming in a big issue. The new generation called millennials is postponing this formal union for years. But, what are the reasons of the delay in getting married or even not getting married in life? An answer could be that they consider that it is not an important thing anymore, but there is a deeper answer for this question. For example, they have not found their significant other, do not have the money to afford a wedding or they are not ready to tie the knot yet. This are the main three reasons according to a Pew Research report made in the year 2014 in the United States.

In my point of view, I think that the main reason is that we have a totally different way of thinking than in previous generations. My mother and grandmother taught me to be very independent and to enjoy life to the fullest; on the contrary, my grandmother was taught how to be a good wife and mother. Because that was the most important thing on those times; to find a supportive husband, have children, and be a happy housewife. And I am sure that this pattern was the same in a lot of parts of the world back then. I am twenty two years old now, and according to Bentley University (2014), “The median age at first marriage is now 27 for women and 29 for men — up from 20 for women and 23 for men in 1960.”

So, if I would have lived in the 1960s I would be married and probably with kids by now. I cannot imagine myself married and with kids at this age, I have so many future plans to achieve. For example, I want to finish college, be successful at my work, meet a lot of new places around the world, etc. And almost all the people of my same range of age thinks exactly like me, so I would say that marriage is an option that is probably left almost at the end of the plans that I mentioned before. After mentioning all of this, I definitely pigeonhole myself in the category of millennials that prefer to postpone marriage to later times. I have a partner in my life right now and we have been together for four years in a row, but we do not have plans for getting married yet, not even in five more years.

My main reason is because I am daughter of divorced parents and I have a different perspective of marriage due to that, I am kind of scared to end up as them. When my parents got divorced I had sixteen years old and it was a very difficult stage for me to overcome. According to Psych Central (2016) “Children have an especially difficult time with divorce. Many times, parents neglect to consider the ramifications of the effects of the divorce on their children.” On those years I did not understand it too much since I was too busy being angry and blaming them for making bad decisions, but now that I am a young adult, I appreciate it a lot. If they had remained married for my brothers and me it would have been worse for us. So, now I have to say that I have learned a lot from their mistakes as a married couple. I am sure that a lot of young people who have gone through this experience before have the same scare feeling of ending up as their divorced parents, if they marry some time.

Overall, the trend of marriage continues to decrease in the actual generations, since, we as millennials, see this ceremony as a mere formality. And after the new law of civil union agreement approved in Chile which demands less commitment than marriage, I think it will be continuing decreasing. But after all, there is nothing to be afraid of, considering that it is a fact that people will continue to get married no matter what. By reasons of culture and religion, of course. Now, the big question that I have is, marriage will evolve in the future, or it will continue to be the same demure ceremony that has existed many years ago? If it changes, I wish I could be alive for when that happens.

Works Cited

1. Bentley University. (2014). Millennials in love: Why they’re in no rush. Retrieved from https://www.bentley.edu/impact/articles/millennials-love-why-theyre-no-rush
2. Paired Life. (2016). Why are millennials not getting married? Retrieved from https://pairedlife.com/dating/Why-are-Millennials-Not-Getting-Married
3. Psych Central. (2016). The effects of divorce on children. Retrieved from https://psychcentral.com/lib/the-effects-of-divorce-on-children
4. Pew Research Center. (2014). Millennials in adulthood: Detached from institutions, networked with friends.