Effective Ways to Deal with Shyness

Introduction

Do you know anyone around you who can overcome the fear of speaking or doing something in public? Or you yourself might be someone shy? “Seven Ways to Beat Shyness,” an article written by Carolyn Kitch (Kitch, 2001), provides information and ideas that can help us overcome this fear of coming out of our shell. Around 40 to 60 percent of adults have claimed to be currently shy, and some of these ideas will surprise you. I will be giving information that I have analyzed through this article by providing evidence and experiences given by the author. When dealing with shyness, you will want to know what triggers your shyness and get a journal to draw down the roots of your fears. According to the article, “Seven Ways to Beat Shyness,” Carolyn Kitch provides an analysis that Christopher McCullough came up with an idea that a written record is a cheap and effective therapist. I feel like writing in a journal helps your mind explore everything around you and come up with ideas of putting yourself out there by confronting and dealing with certain situations that might make you feel exposed and scared. I believe that those thoughts that are being written down in a journal are a way of accepting them and learning how to deal with being shy. Overall, this idea will not only help you be prepared for the next time you encounter an awkward situation, but also make you feel relieved when feeling nervous as you deal or associate with others.

Body Language Techniques

Another way to beat shyness is through your body language; the ways that you project your body to others could make them think differently about you. For example, if someone who is shy focuses on the impression they are trying to make, the person listening or watching them will have an idea of what that person is like just by their body language. In the article, “Seven Ways to Beat Shyness,” Carolyn Kitch introduces a method, given by Arthur Wassmer, called “SOFTEN” (Kitch, 2001). SOFTEN stands for: smile, open posture, lean forward, touch, eye contact, nod. The article provides the understanding that this method is a great way to show others that you’re affirmatively attentive and it shows that you are interested. Some of these examples listed are useful when giving a presentation to a group of people. When communicating with others, you must always have an open posture and shake their hand. Doing this will help you and the other person feel more comfortable in the situation you are in. Making eye contact and leaning forward allows you to not feel intimidated by the other person. Smiling and nodding often deliver the impression of interest that you have within the conversation. Overall, this method is convenient when talking to new people and making new relationships with others.

Taking Small Steps

The last idea that I found intriguing is taking small steps towards beating your inner fear. Based on “Seven Ways to Beat Shyness,” Carolyn Kitch uses an example in which a 35-year-old lady wants to pursue her career but can’t because she is afraid of being called on and having to speak in a classroom setting. Marjorie Couborun, director of the Phobia and Anxiety Treatment Center in La Jolla, had the woman step on the campus, where she would study, which would accommodate her and work her way up to get an idea of how people communicate with one another while attending school (Kitch, 2001). College students might find these techniques useful. Especially freshmen, the environment they are stepping into is very different from the one they were used to. A new environment can cause you to overthink and feel anxiety, taking little steps can help conquer this shyness. Starting off by “wetting your feet,” getting a feel of what you are going to get yourself associated with can help increase your confidence. Once you have “wet” your feet, you must start building up a plan and overcome these scary public speaking conflicts by reminding yourself to take everything step-by-step. Overall, taking it step-by-step is a useful strategy to help students with upcoming confrontations when giving speeches or talking to others.

Conclusion

To conclude, journal writing, body language, and taking small steps are different ways to beat shyness when it comes to collaborating with someone. Writing in a journal is a good way to admit to your fear and being aware of it. Therefore, you can try and do something about those fears that you are writing in the journal. Try to be as honest and note how those situations make you feel by including details. Body language can give you a boost of how you project yourself to people around you. It is a technique that is helpful when speaking in front of people or in front of someone you just met. Taking it step-by-step is another strategy that we can consider using; learning to deal with our shyness will only happen if you put effort into it. I believe that all three resolutions can help you in your everyday life because we meet someone new almost every day.

References

Kitch, C. (2001). Seven ways to beat shyness. Psychology Today. Retrieved from [URL of the article]