The 21st century has introduce a new way of life in the dating world. Traditionally, whenever a person was interested in dating, he/she would have to actually meet the other person first then plan for a date from there on depending on the first impression both receive. Clearly, this methods did not leave a lot of options open. In some cases, friends would play matchmakers by organizing blind dates. Before, no one ever imagined that people would late be capable of meeting several matches in small duration and still do away with unlikely or unsuitable candidates, simply from the comfort of their own homes or workplaces.
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'Online Dating Better Or Traditional Dating'
In the current technological world, socializing and communicating with other people from different parts of the world without being physically close to them has become so simple, considering the evolution of the internet. Today, getting to know someone no longer needs knowing their voice, touch or even their face. A personal profile set up in an online platform can clearly narrate a person’s whole life story, and relationships can be formed between users simply through words which are conveyed as short messages in chat rooms. However, to what level does this impersonal fraternizing remain credible? There is a certain level of intimacy that the web-based dating platforms can never engender no matter the argument. Regardless of how far technology has transformed human nature, the society today is still incapable of innovating a technology which can be able to transmit sensory impulses. For instance, the internet can only provide human profiles and chat rooms to exchange lovely quotes. It cannot transmit a sense of touch like a pat on the back, kiss or feel. Thus, the whole basis for dating is via the internet is limited to epithets set by the owners of the profiles themselves. This is actually not a very accurate portrayal considering the fact that honesty is so scare both in cyber space communities and the real world. Old fashioned dating methods allows for a tangibility aspect that, from a persona opinion, will never exist in any online dating platform. At least not in the near future.
Whereas online dating offers the possibility that the real people behind the profiles may not be represented accurately, old methods of dating sets a very brief, precise and reliable standard; what you see, is what you get. Obviously, with this standards no one can be led astray into what they are not interested in. according to Sarah Algoe (2008), “Online dating is like walking into a dark cave. ” The metaphor she uses of the ‘dark cave’ is not a far stretch regardless of the idea that one cannot be able to certify whether the other person behind the online profile is being truthful and laying all the facts on the table about themselves (Dating Article Site, 2007).
Not only is dating in any online platform inaccurate, but it is also corrosive to the entire worldwide community. This avoids being labeled as an embellishment simply on the reasons that using this emerging technologies has actually made things impersonal to human kind, these ‘distancing technologies are keeping every person, well, some distance away from each other and out of touch as well (Bells, 2008). However, for some people, both online dating and traditional dating work hand in hand. According to Jullie Spira (2013), whether setting up an online dating profile leads to marriage or not, finding love online should be a part of everyone’s dating regime. Thus, if online dating is done in an appropriate way, it could be simple another service or method that will get people out there in the real world to meet other people offline and meet more people.
Total dependence on the internet is a position that kills us softly with promises of easy socializing. But when did personally meeting with a person become too difficult? Face-to-face conversation is an acquired talent, but a necessary asset. Nevertheless, this fact has not impeded on the progression of online dating to worldwide popularity. McLelland argues that “The stigma of going online to find your love has pretty much disappeared, and now, it is almost praised when you find someone through the Internet. ” Evidently, being able to find love online has recently spread all over the universe just like a plague exceeding the initial purpose of the creation of the internet.
Online dating can also be very devastating. Keeping matters organized might result in someone losing interest in the whole process. Paul (2014) argues that “Online dating has been shown to provide individuals with too many options to choose from. That leads to a lack of exclusivity where individuals find it difficult to be locked into one dating partner, when they know that hundreds of other potential dating partners are available. This also leads to delayed commitment to the person with whom they ultimately choose to date and start a relationship. ” Considering the levels of the influx of options, a person might not give a date a fair opportunity if there was someone more interesting that caught their attention. A practice like this encourages infidelity with various distinct options of people to select from.
On the other hand, as mentioned before, a person using an online dating platform cannot really tell if the other person is telling the truth, or if the information provided on their profiles and how they are represented might be false, meeting strange people especially online is potentially risky. Although this phrase cannot be verified, but it is somehow true. These online dating sites do not conduct a background check on their clients, thus, they entirely depend on the information the user decides to reveal. Other personal information such as places of birth, age or level of education can possibly be altered to fit a certain category in the online platform. Then, is dating online truly a better option? From a personal perspective, this actually depends on the person who seeks for love from online platforms. Whether marriage or just a casual relationship, online dating has caused high rates of break ups compared to traditional forms of dating. According to (Paul, 2014), in spite the intentions a person has when deciding to use online dating platforms, non-marital or marital relationships that are formed from an online experience are highly doomed to fail. Sixty percent of couples who meet online are living in non-marital romantic relationships and a minority are reported to be married. On the contrary, online couples have reduced chances of falling deeply in love with each other and get married compared to couples who meet physically. A bigger population of online dater are seeking more casual relationships instead of marriages. Hence, less relationships will merely result in marriage if both partners are equally interested in casual dating equally.
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Subsequently, while most people can consider using the web-based platforms an easy way to socialize and communicate with other people without physically getting in contact with them, it should be limited to, and not encompass, online dating. These emergent technologies have managed to connect people, but it cannot succeed the limits set by real life itself. In order to really fall in love with someone it is essential for both parties to be in physical contact and not just pictures and lovely texts that most people nowadays scroll on the screens of their computers and smart phones. ReferenceBells. (2008,). Is online dating doing more harm than good?
Works Cited
- Algoe, S. B. (2008). Online dating: Plenty of fish in the sea or swimming in a murky pond? Pers Soc Psychol Bull, 34(3), 369-383.
- Bargh, J. A., McKenna, K. Y., & Fitzsimons, G. M. (2002). Can you see the real me? Activation and expression of the “true self” on the Internet. Journal of social issues, 58(1), 33-48.
- Bells, K. (2008). The dangers of online dating. The Ottawa Citizen. Retrieved from https://www.canada.com/ottawacitizen/news/story.html?id=3c4edf1e-26c4-44ab-a94c-5c5d505ec6e5
- Dating Article Site. (2007). Online dating vs traditional dating. Retrieved from http://www.datingarticlesite.com/online-dating-vs-traditional-dating.html
- Finkel, E. J., Eastwick, P. W., Karney, B. R., Reis, H. T., & Sprecher, S. (2012). Online dating: A critical analysis from the perspective of psychological science. Psychological science in the public interest, 13(1), 3-66.
- Kiesler, S., Siegel, J., & McGuire, T. W. (1984). Social psychological aspects of computer-mediated communication. American psychologist, 39(10), 1123.
- McLelland, M. (2016). Online dating: A critical analysis from the perspective of psychological science. Psychological Science in the Public Interest, 17(3), 3-66.
- Paul, A. (2014). Is online better than offline for meeting partners? Depends: Are you looking to marry or to date? Cyberpsychology, Behavior, and Social Networking, 17(10), 664-667.
- Spira, J. (2013). The perils of cyber-dating: Confessions of a hopeful romantic looking for love online. Morgan James Publishing.
- Walther, J. B., & Parks, M. R. (2002). Cues filtered out, cues filtered in: Computer-mediated communication and relationships. Handbook of interpersonal communication, 3, 529-563.
