Research Divorce and The Main Issues Related to It

There are many perspectives which will be discussed further in my research divorce i.e. global perspective, national perspective and religious perspective. The issues of divorce are financial problems, forced marriages, child abortion, conflicts and misunderstandings between the couple.

What is divorce? It is a legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body. Divorce happens when couples have serious issues between them and there are no solutions to solve it. The rate of divorce has been increased with the passage of time. Divorce is common now. If any problem comes up between the married couple, they just find a solution which is divorce, they do not find any other solution which causes a divorce. It has increased since forced marriages have been increased, abortion rate has increased (one needs a child one doesn’t it causes conflicts which causes divorce), people nowadays face financial problems a lot which makes the couple unhappy.

Perspectives

Global

Divorce creates chaos in the family instead of achieving a united family. Divorce is not a desirable act in any religion, rather at the global trend of divorce is incredibly and continuously increasing. It is a Global problem. It is very alarming situation for the survival of a family. People now are not realizing their responsibilities. One of these reasons is to get married early at the age of 15-20, when they are not fully prepared for the marriage, not mature enough and at the adulthood it caused problems for the family.

National

In the last two decades, there is a raise of divorce in Pakistan. The main reasons for divorce is lack of sacrifice, forced marriages, difference of social status. With the divorce rate on the increase in Pakistan women becoming increasingly independent often placing their careers before family and husband. So many women are getting higher education is one reason the women wants to achieve more. Younger couples are more likely to get divorced. Waiting for the maturity to set in before tying a knot is also one of the reasons. According to a survey most of the lawyers approved that the rate of divorce is increasing in the middle and lower middle class. Financial problem is one of the main reasons in Pakistan. Normally in lower middle class husbands lack in fulfilling their wives demands, which provokes to dispute.

Religious

Islamic: Divorce in Islam is the most disliking legal act in an Muslim’s eye. It’s a fact that Muslim community has larger numbers of divorce than before. Divorce is not good since it causes enmity and also a cause of Satan’s delight.

Judaism: In this religion, they believe divorce is a fact of life. Though it is an unfortunate one. In Jewish law divorce is an act of the parties to the marriage, which is different from the approach adopted by the legal system. If one needs divorce there is no need of allegations or proof to prove who is wrong by either of the party.

Hinduism: The attitude of Hindus towards divorce vary a lot. It rarely happens but is forbidden. They believe in karma or international action. Hindus discourage with divorce because they think it will affect the family and upset the child. Many other believe in divorce, since the couple is living in hatred and it creates a negative impact on the child. This may bring bad karmic consequences.

Issues

Forced marriages

Parents from the rural areas sale out their daughter, only for money. Even if the girl is not happy the parents do not consider that. They take it as a grain of salt. Only the greediness of money, takes the parent to sale out their daughters. Also some parents in urban areas never listen to their children they just take their own decisions. At times before the birth of the child or when the child is born, parents right over, decide who will the child marry when he/she grows up.

Financial problem

This problem is very common since some years. People lose their jobs and sit and the families are not happy. This leads them to divorce.

Abortion problem

This problem is also very common since in a marriage one needs a baby and one does not, which makes them to lead to a solution which is abortion. In china when there was one child policy couples always wanted a son they use to abort a daughter. Even if a woman was pregnant she had to abort a baby forcibly since it was a policy. The one child policy was banned since it had no rights for the baby as well as the woman.

Physical and emotional abuse

Husband beats his wife just if she does not listen to him for once. Whereas if the male does not listen to the female and if the female argues she is beaten by her husband because she argued with him. Not only physical abuse is happening but also mental and emotional abuse. Men abuse women on the silliest things. This happens in the rural areas. Women do not get their right. She is beaten by her husband in front of her kids, which gives bad and negative impacts on them.

Consequences

Divorce breaks down both the families. It ruins the child’s life by getting a negative impact. It even ruins the lives of male and female especially female. It also breaks the male and the female mentally and physically.

Solutions

The solutions for divorce are:

Spend more quality time with each other

There are alot of couples who are not happy, simply because they dont feel to relate with each other anymore. Going on dates, taking vacations is not only what you need in a marriage. These should not be the priorities of a person who is married. However a healthy marriage goes a long way when you stop taking small things as your priorities and spend a quality of time with each other so you can know each other much better and start having a healthy life.

Change the negative patterns

Do always couples fight on the silliest things? Do either of them lose their temper on a drop of a hat? Breaking these negative patterns would lead a healthier marriage and the couples should embrace good habits. Couples should be respectful towards each other.

Compromise with each other

Marriage is all about compromising with each other on the smallest things. Compromise in marriage is defined as to give up on one thing for the other. It is very important to make a difference between sacrifice and compromise. It is important to compromise rather to sacrifice. In a marriage, nearly every decision and every problem has to be compromised by one at least. It is very rare if both agree on a simple thing. Since marriage is involved, the points of disagreement can be pretty impressive. For example, one might disagree about politics, religion, or child rearing principals. One might disagree about money, or how much influence in-laws should have in one’s life.

My perspective

In my own perspective divorce should be only discouraged when there is no other solution and it is affecting the family or the children. A negative impact on a child can ruin his life by seeing his parents fighting all the time. If there are various solutions to solve the problem you shouldn’t prefer divorce but sit together and solve out what exactly is the problem. By having divorce, it can affect the whole family and in this part it would even ruin their child’s life. People nowadays find it a joke: if a small fight comes up between them they decide to be separated; not realizing about how will it affect the child if no baby is born then how will it affect the lives of themselves and the families for instance if the parents of both are good friends or cousins it would even affect their relationship. Without thinking about this they just call a lawyer and tell them to get the papers ready for divorce. This should not be how it is. Divorce should only be discouraged when the couple is at the last of anything. Rather than that divorce should not be discouraged.

Conclusion

In conclusion, it is a person’s right to choose what he or she wants. No one should be forced for anything; sometimes in-laws force the male to give divorce to the female just because she cannot be a mother. It is just that one should not force anyone just because they are not happy from it.

References

1. https://nation.com.pk/29-Nov-2018/divorce-a-global-problem
2. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_and_divorce
3. https://medium.com/@Allaboutyouwithrifa/divorce-in-islamic-perspectives-3a0c163b0f19
4. https://www.marriage.com/advice/divorce/5-proven-solutions-to-divorce/
5. https://www.marriage.com/advice/divorce/10-most-common-reasons-for-divorce/
6. https://www.popline.org/node/416851