450+ experts on 30 subjects ready to help you just now
Starting from 3 hours delivery
Remember! This is just a sample.
You can get your custom paper by one of our expert writers.
Get custom essay121 writers online
Why is physical education important? This essay discusses the benefits of physical education and its importance for children in schools.
First of all, P.E helps kids who do not have an active lifestyle at home be healthy and get moving. The United States has one of the highest rates of childhood obesity. Many kids today do not go outside to play but instead stay inside and play video games or watch TV. This kind of lifestyle is not healthy and can result in health problems such as, type 2 diabetes, certain heart conditions, high blood pressure, and many other diseases that could potentially become life threatening as they grow older. It is also fun for kids and gives them a well needed break from sitting in class all day.
Kids can also discover new sports that they have never played before and might even take it up as an after school activity. Statistics have shown that children who go to schools which don’t have P.E are more likely to have a higher rate of children who are not active out of school. Physical Education can encourage healthy and fun lifestyles in school as well as out of school. Kids also get stressed out from school work and P.E can help reduce stress and give them time to have fun and forget about it. They can also learn other valuable skills from this class such as teamwork and having good sportsmanship.
As you can see, the importance of Physical Education is proved in this essay. It is an extremely important class that every school should have. There are many benefits can come from P.E that can help someone become active, take care of their body, and reduce stress.
The essay reflects a poor attempt at academic writing since it lacks detail, analytical analysis, and thorough examples. There are quite a lot of improvements that can be made to improve the quality of the essay. Firstly, the first paragraph lacks a hook statement which generally alludes to the thesis statement. The introduction is adequate but the thesis statement is ineffective since the writer should express concisely in a single sentence the benefits that physical education provides . The evidence presented is severely deficient in supporting the arguments in the thesis statement. Therefore, the writer needs to add more examples to score a higher mark. Word choice is appropriate and the writer’s expression is clear. There are only minor problems in sentence construction. However, the organization of the essay needs improvement. This can be done by adding subheadings and by making sure that each paragraph elaborates on only one point.
Remember: This is just a sample from a fellow student.
450+ experts on 30 subjects ready to help you just now
Starting from 3 hours delivery
We provide you with original essay samples, perfect formatting and styling
To export a reference to this article please select a referencing style below: